Sunday, 13 January 2019

gussawala asr

on the forum, someone asked me, after reading my ff not cut out for love, why i was "so obsessed with this dominant-ruthless-gussawala ASR so much?" :) my answer...

oh, that gussa of asr, sneha, how to explain how deeply it used to move me. the sudden flare ups of this otherwise cool calculated reasonable young man. his gussa spoke stories, stories no one ultimately told... nani ji had once said his gussa was like his father's and oh the sharp snapping retort... i am nothing like him.

and his gussa's measure hinted at the measure of the pyaar he could give... till then only given to his maa and his sis... but to overcome that shattered trust always echoing in his gussa and to give his pyaar, as intense as and even more than his gussa, to a complete outsider... for someone to actually breach that gussa fort of his... that was their pyaar which was difficult to find a name for. would anyone love a man who dragged them to a temple seething, cursing, angry and thrust sindoor on their maang? should anyone? this was a question almost implicit in the show. yet, khushi did. she could read beyond the gussa, she knew somewhere what brought on the gussa, and she perhaps ached to soothe it even as she was stoked to gussa herself. this was a beautiful story of emotions, how they are not always easily understood or explained.

that marriage was forced on the show, intersting that writers turned it into a forced marriage :). i have heard it was not supposed to be this, it was to be a forced live in situation instead. well, whatever it was to be... the crux of it would be asr's gussa at the thought of betrayal. khushi made very interesting observations about his anger. how he gets angry and does ridiculous and wrong things, then calms down and tries to set things right. that gussa was as much asr as his sexiness, his intelligence, his humour, his deep down soft heart, his regard for women, his ache, him.

ohhhohoho, no, mushy sweet asr just doesn't feel like asr to me.

and the asr i feel and hold dear, will do things which aren't always completely right. sometimes i will not be able to forgive him even, like that dropping her to the floor below from his office, even to some extent that marriage, and that snappng of dori... but all of that is him. you have to take a person as they are if they mean anything to you. yes, you can suggest change, hope they'll calm down a bit and get better... but there are no guarantees. khushi took that chance. i have great regard for her for seeing right into his character. and because she perhaps understood love better than he did, she never decided to change him even when it hurt her... and she could make him see sides of things in the most touching way, i so enjoyed her ultimate explanation to asr as to why she is doing karwa chauth, and how it really doesn't matter if he does not believe in such things. the girl is grand in many ways, and she has her share of gussa. thank h.

so yeah, hmmm, seems like i like gussawala asr.


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