Thursday, 13 October 2016

that sorry episode 1

chose an episode to watch on the basis of the green pullover that showed up on the hotstar menu. okay, i knew it was the sorry episode. what i'd forgotten or perhaps never really noticed was how much more was there in it... sorry is culmination... the kill. but all the things all around to stoke the moment into existence. i have gone a bit crazy. bear with me.

and to match the "inbhijible" nephew's pullover, sweet mano wearings that necklacewa. haye.

episode 84


that sorry episode 2

lavanya and asr. they always make me smile. she is off to a party without him, in her short dress. thank h, the poor girl, constantly in those khushi like clothes which is just not her... though how hard she tries... girl's determined. also, she needs party. okay story needs party. but nicely written in, writers use it to sketch character further. asr totally cool about gf going to party on her own minus him. i like this man. just that hahha he can't take the ji ji. the irritated angry note is on from the beginning... because, of course, of one girl. not this one.

the moment he hears her name, oh that superb stop and poke head out... he who was about to slam the door in supreme indifference.

the meeting after that... she is hurt and upset, he wants to apologise... a little tremulous almost this nasty man. would he have managed to apologise? perhaps. but then how to get to the gazebo. la had to interrupt. then those palats... so much in their eyes, their body language... at this point of course, no idea we have of what's to come. 

a note of zany humour in "khushi, lavanya ki party mein?" writers really sparked so many emotions in us this episode. 

episode 84



that sorry episode 3

she is standing there thinking of what the laad governor said to her. out of the blue, the words come. well, she has seen him for the first time after his mega anger and pushing away of her, after a lot of emotional upheaval. so, no, it's not really strange. he has hurt her badly. and no matter how hard she tries, she can't set it aside... baat aapki hai. anyone else, and she may have not been this upset, but already what he says has started mattering a lot. and he has done nothing to make sure she hurts less, never forgetting to lace everything with a bit of aukat talk.

she turns and it's him.

that "khushi..." my knees froze.

awkwardness, a tender something, and the next moment they are yelling at each other... i love this exchange. so so natural. when you're aware of each other and you really don't know why but yet the other person is never just another guy, another girl... conversation is never as it is with others. 

it's getting intense. then suddenly... have you bought all the daring in the world?...

the look on his face. just a strain of humour but lots of friction, fire... khushi is ranting, losing control... the completely funny angry, "what nonsense!" from suit boot man who has been told by behenji to go, not bother her and then this daring talk... really what non...

she must tell him off and there goes madam overstepping the mark... such flawless signs of attraction... that weird ownership. she can tell him what she likes... at least when she is not thinking. not thinking... it's all about that, isn't it. just feeling. whatever. anything. usually anger... that's how some things reveal themselves to us i guess.

a bit of humour but then she wipes a tear and agony. he must say sorry... he must. where's she.

in the meantime, writers have used every intercut to show where a pretty unforgivable guy getting wary of an astute man. i never noticed that babu ji saw the mark of ring on the cad's finger. mami said things that gave hintiya of isstory. poor akash, he was too cute once.

episode 84 


that sorry episode 4

an arrogant, cool man and a crazy jhalli girl... they mustn't meet, they are not meant to meet, their worlds are separate. but does the gazebo know that... do the fairylights care. a young man and a young girl stand before me, both have known the same terrible, terrifying moment... no matter what brought it on, that moment of becoming vulnerable, defenceless, shelterless. they both are orphans... orphaned suddenly, both parents gone at once, the same night. and he just needs to say sorry to her... and she needs to tell him how much he has hurt her...

how do you keep your tycoonness intact despite this moment? how do you go back to being the happy jhalli who never cries despite this breakdown... oh, that say sorry she flings at him. then the aukat talk... he has crossed the mark too often, hurt her, dammit.

every time i see this scene, that intense sense of connection.

episode 84


that sorry episode 5

you cried today, didn't you?

how could i not have noticed this gorgeous scene before. asr trying hard to be asr. something so badly shaken within. and yes, he did cry... for her, for him, for he had so many tears that he didn't know how to cry. and his sister feeling his vibe. of course, barun had to look this good. actually, every scene this episode... not inbhijible at all those incredible looks. love the shirt, that casual changing into more comfortable clothes, our suit.

that expression. irritated and helpless, kaisan nand kissore.

episode 84


that sorry episode 6

he's rattled. she's almost euphoric... rula hi diya has something good in it. she never ever thought that fellow would apologise, she also had no idea how that would make her feel. they are both making each other pagal... smartly, the word is brought in via payal... the episode has taken me through so many feelings and now that euphoria hums along and comes nearer. yes, cry, asr and look bombed at the overflow of "sorry". drink your tea, khushi. and mull over those confusing feelings. by the way, i loved your rant at him and telling him all about your fears... said you trusted him though you really didn't know it. just as he will, when he'll ask you, can my mother see me, does she like what she sees... beautiful writing and extraordinary acting. light yet deep, a little soap in it and yet so real.

edit: indu just pointed out he had already shared his innermost and lingering pain with her when he had brutally pushed her away saying, so one knows how one feels when one returns after cremating ones parents... there was already a funny sort of trust between the two. 


episode 84


Wednesday, 12 October 2016

episodes 133/134/136/137/138 it's in your eyes

time was running out... saansey was about to complete its term, i was still far behind the target 139. only done up to 132. decided to do some ramanchi. i would try and find one scene to talk about in the episodes pending and see what i came up with.

and so i began to search and noticed the moments... "something in the eyes" little scenes that were there right through. almost every episode had them. asr's eyes mainly... once in a way khushi's too.

after the blast and heat of:

"tum samajhti kya ho apne aap ko"... who do you think you are...  you think i am angry because of you... that whatever i do i do because of you... if you think it makes any difference to me your being or not being here... "tumhare hone ya na hone se koi faraq padta hai..." then forget it... you don't even exist for me... do you understand...  tum ho ya na ho... whether you're there or not... kuch kaho, kuch karo... mujhe usse koi faraq nahin padta... whether you say something or do something, doesn't make a damn difference to me...
after that tirade, that spiraling of rage, something seems to have cooled inside this ravaged, man constanty grappling with that edge of raw pain writhing in him, trying to shut out all feelings with desperate ramparts of don't care. but suddenly now there's an easing... especially since she cut the fire with calm... and non aggression. a sort of cleansing perhaps in that outpouring, a detox as it were.

ever since that evening, he is curiously aware of her. and of course, just now in the restaurant her "phree biskut" spin has him reaching desperately for his smug, superior air just in case he should completely melt and show those "pyaar wyaar" feelings he knows nothing of.

i was completely blown away by these scenes coming up. if you string them together it's a gorgeous length of, well this is ipk so it must be pearls, pearls that would never lose nacre or lustre. arnav means ocean, and pearls find so many references and allusions here. sometimes i think, the ocean had all the pearls in him, among them the most precious one, his dil, someone had to dive in and find it. then she came, togged in gota and off centre plait, slip off mojris, pompoms bobbing, and a smile that would cheer up the gloomiest soul. sunny, bright, sparkling a creature, that could reach and light up the darkest corners of the ocean and find those pearls.

how he enjoyed her "khushi" type sanka as they planned the charging of jiji's resistence and uniting akash and payal. a love of their siblings brought them together, but those hours of scheming together, guard down, khushi in filmi overdrive, and then success, achieved together... somehow it all made him feel all sorts of funny things for this jhalli babe.

i must say again, he fell for her at those weird khushi moments... that's when she got right through, past all barriers and reinforced concrete walls, to his heart and left a little mark there that was indelible. permanent damage.

and yes, he did feel a certain something when she fought back and refused to take nonsense from him. i think that fire attracted him too.

anyway, the scenes.

episode 133

here as she tells him to manage akash, he looks at her home and suddenly his mood seems to shift. a bit thoughtful, almost mellow, then he turns and wants to tell her something... "
uh, khushi, mujhe tumse kuch... "

uh, khushi, something to you i wanted... the quality of his voice, a little lost. contrite? unsure? the music had changed, become tender, like that day that she told him about the stars.

what did he want to say to her? this was a moment of quiet after the rage the previous evening and all the hectic activity of the day... did he want to tell her he didn't mean those things he'd said? about her not mattering? tum ho ya na ho?

i couldn't figure out, but there was something sort of terribly important he wanted to tell her... however that was not to be since someone had disappeared.

"tum wahan kya kar rahi ho!" what are you doing there?

then the crazy coot talk from the floor... tell me he didn't fall for her then.

a cute exchange:
"akash achha hai... mera bhai hai." akash is good, he's my bro. so innocently arrogant if that makes any sense.

"usske bawajood bhi achchhe hain..." despite that he's nice. at his what the look, khushi's spin on that unwise comeback was really funny.

my favourite line:
"par khushi ek problem hai... tumhara plan bahut stoopid hai... fail ho jaayga." but khushi there's a problem... your plan is very stupid... it will fail. love the way the boy says "stoopid." very delhi... i say stoopid just like that too.

a series of moments from the time he comes to give payal the letter to all four of them walking back happily to the car, where he looked at her, sometimes exasperated, or challenging, but also oddly tender, considering, curious. they even managed to laugh together, he was certainly utterly amused with this melodrama queen. and had to admit her plan, however stoopid, had worked.

though uncomfortable with the plan, he is happy for his brother, and at least once he looks at her with what seemed like acknowledgement; of course, our jhalli is in her hyper, over excited, doer mood and possibly misses it.

his eyes find her again and again and there are so many things they seem to say... but for now she misses most of them, though once in a way there's a meeting of eyes and and a delightful awkwardness in her, always a search in him.

"main baat karoonga, ghar walo ko main sambhal loonga..." i will talk to the family and manage them. when he says that, she looks at him with clear, happy eyes, gentle, grateful, acknowledging.

so she does one part, he the other. partners... team... equals? can't stop looking at her as they walk to the car.

episode 134

"bhai, khushi ji thodi paagal hai... ekdam alag hai," bhai, khushi ji is a bit mad, absolutely different... when akash says that, involuntarily a look in asr's eyes. akash walks away. a pause... music running around the mind...  his face getting softer, he's reflecting upon something rather lovely... a smile lifts a corner of his lips. "haan pagal toh hai..." yes, mad she is. sounded like, "absolutely gorgeous she is." and tell me, what's that look in his eyes. i mean how terribly doting and tender and dreamy must a man look.

"pagal," he said like a man in love on a holi morning, even when he thought she was a harlot, a home wrecker.

such a telling scene this. she is firmly entrenched under his skin... dare i say, in his heart.

when she storms his den with many questions, alleging gross inefficiency and ineffectiveness in his mission, he doesn't yell at her... most unusual. instead, he tries to get her to calm down.

"khushi? relax... calm down... gehrin saans lo," take deep breaths. but she is incapable of such things at this point... too excitable.

and so comes the fabulous...


a hilarious exchange between the two about the problem at hand. he is trying to stay cool, obviously he's told himself that he can handle miss sanaka. brave fellow. see i'm cool is his air. but she manages to irritate him and the snarl is almost out. madam is delighted, hero is unable to control emotions, gets gussa. she will teach him how to be poised and persuasive and influence mami. after listening to her filmi dialogues for a while, asr has to say what he has to say.

"what crap."

episode 136

everyone is at gh, nani ji has come to ask payal's elders for her hand in marriage...  as everyone settles down, khushi goes to shut the door, and his hand comes and touches the door at the same time as hers. his hand covers her hand. neither flinch from the touch. instead, a long, aware look. he seems to just want to look at her... almost searching for something at times. i loved the car keys hanging from his thumb... felt like asr. something terribly active about this character... he strides, he goes up to life, he moves... sometimes mountains. that key looked somehow sexy, don't ask me why.

later his ire at the talk of khushi's fiance and those looks exchanged between them as she knocks on her fiance's door. this man is terribly aware of her. more than ever before.

episode 137

a moment with her when she is troubled... a helping hand on the door, as though to say, "i am here." what an intimate and intense shot up there. the body language is so expressive. they seem to flow into each other, she turns to him, seeking, he look sat her, his body protective almost in stance, eyes looking into hers... need me? i'm, here.

they are just acting, right?

then he lingers... shall i call the doctor... some people feel like your own, even if nothing says so officially.

"kuch dawaiyya ya kuch..."  some medicines or, some... he doesn't just walk away. even when he leaves, a turn back, a bit of thinking, perhaps wondering if he can help her in any way.

later, he returns to apologise to payal.
  the sorry is almost blurted out like he couldn't wait to say it. asr never says sorry. "sorry, meri vajah se apki shadi tot gayi... ekbar rishta pukka ho jaye, phir sorry bol doonga..." sorry, because of me your wedding was called off... i thought let the relationship get the nod, then i'll say sorry. an air of urgency, an innocence, an almost vulnerable open face. "maine use jaane se roka tha... i'm really sorry," i stopped her from leaving... i'm really sorry.

and finally, jumping to her defence... "usski koi galati nahin thi," it was no fault of hers. bravo, asr, you've come a long way, baby.

my favourite line, "decide khushi kumari gupta, what do you want?" around that forceful turn around and almost collide into each other... lots of centripetal force here.

then as she is about to answer, he says, you know what... i don't want to know. nice. when his eyes said things, she was too hyper to hear. now her eyes are soft and yielding, so he must run. could be because he could sense the danger... he might melt and become puddle.

no problem. she lets the air out of his tyre and we are treated to another classic bout of comedy.

episode 138

as i look at babu ji reacting to anjali, and all the "sya... sya," i am amazed that khushi never made the connection once she found out... she didn't figure out that babuji knew.

138 builds up toward and gets set for the revelation of 139. khushi has picked up enough hints to get really concerned. perhaps a part of her has already arrived at the truth. but it is so shocking maybe she can't process it. 

"tum yahan kya kar rahi ho..." what are you doing here, he asks sensing she's not quite herself. in her confusion and growing suspicion she's wandered into his den... it's him always she needs when she needs real help, like in the hospital... beautiful touch, she does it instinctively.

"kya hua?" what happened? she's silent, eyes lost.

"kuch chahiye tumhe?"
do you want something? a little brusque the coice, yet there's concern... and patience.

"kuch baat karni hai?"  do you want to say something? i wonder did he want to hear something from her?  so tender...  seems to bridge right back to 133 and his searching preamble "khushi, mujhe tumse..."

she is terribly troubled. her eyes focus but it's brimming with an ominous feeling. she turns and leaves, unable to say what's bothering her.

edit: reading anita's comments reminded me of something i wanted to say here. it's such good story telling and insight, she's found her way to his room... to him, without knowing so consciously. in fact, she's startled to find herself here. it looks as though she's wondering aimlessly in her frazzled state, but she has unerrigly made her way to the place where she needs to come... to him, to find calm, sense, protection. her insides have sensed that care, that protectiveness that flows from him. beautiful. there was never any need to say this was love, you just felt it was. uff if only i could write like that.
he goes back to work with an "unbelievable..." maybe, he needs to shake off that unfamiliar feeling of concern and care for this woman who means nothing to him... whether she's there or not, it really makes no difference. faraq nahin padta.

only one piece, this item.


completely unedited. hmmm.


feeling arnav ji feeling episodes
episode rambles

episode 137 khushi's crazy uncle

it has to be one of my most favourite asr kkg moments, that white sleeved arm coming out and pushing the door open, even as she struggled to reach it as she took her father back to his room.

and the look asr gave khushi, how much was in that... how can all the time so much be said without using practically any words. back in communications class, we often talked of subliminal communication, non verbal communication, etc. with these two one gets a complete sense of that.

earlier he had pushed open a door when she least expected it. now again. maybe all this means something. even if it doesn't, the way he looks at her and she responds, it's hard to imagine these are actors and that isn't love, just make believe.

of course, shashi ji has recognised anjali and is beside himself with worry and a desperation to communicate the truth about shyam. "sya... sya..." he calls out. khushi understands it's shyam he speaks of... but she doesn't even begin to guess what the truth might be, although she knows both anjali's husband and her fiance have the same name.

in the sitting room there's talk of calling khushi's mangetar, fiance. the look of ire and that something else on asr's face is again talkative as hell, shyam babua is mentioned again and again. yet, all these fairly intelligent people, none of them connect the two names when all hell breaks lose later post kidnap... of course, asr doesn't believe khushi when she tells him the facts. no one seems to recall that bua ji had clearly uttered khushi's fiance's name and it was shyam. 

a beautiful look exchanged between the two lovers over the fiance search. the lovers quite unaware of their intense attraction, one deciding to relegate it to acidity and the other hellbent on running away from any and all tender feelings coming over him. but he keeps being terrifically sweet to her today.

clearly this is arnav singh raizada's dil at work. the same one which he complains about to khushi one evening on a telepathic chat. '"itni koshish ki, maine itni zyada koshish ki tumse nafrat kar sakoon... par main tumse nafrat kar hi nahin paya, mera khudka dil meri baat hi nahin maanta,"  i tried so hard to hate you but i couldn't, my own heart wouldn't listen to me.


he'd told her it's best if she kept away from him, but he couldn't stop himself from rushing to help her. as he stood there watching her fret over babu ji, he looked so concerned, maybe he recalled how important her father was to her, and her fear and despair at the hospital. when he came out of the room, he hesitated and looked back, something was bothering him... as he left their place he saw khushi hugging her sister in great joy, he watched, his eyes seemed to twinkle as if he were really happy to see her so thrilled... maybe he did a little bit of all this not just for akash, but also for the girl who means nothing to him.

then came that sublime hesitation and his decision at last to come back. khushi was totally taken aback. he wanted to speak to her alone? no, not her, her sister. kkg jumped in front of payal protectively. he looked sternly at her, looking even more drop dead gorgeous if it were possible and said with his impeccable delhi amriki accent, "leave us alone."

payal was lovely as she told her sis to be reasonable and let him talk to her. khushi pouted. asr frowned. does this man practice his frowns? how does he get them to look this good? inbhestigasson kareka padi.

thankfully, the favourite ipk rescue devise, the phone... it rang.

out came "hay.. haylo," kkg style.

and a few feet away, a quick "sorry," asr style.

i loved that scene, everything about it. payal was magnificent, asr was moving... then with a touch of the comic khushi barged in. she heard what was being said... and again was struck by a million emotions. tears threatened to pour, a tremulous smile its first indication.

payal said the trouble was khushi believed the breaking of payal's wedding was all her fault.

a man who said he had no heart in his chest, who said she meant nothing to him, jumped in protectively, "usski koi galati nahin hai..." it's no fault of hers.

again i felt that traction, something entered and settled in my heart. this was a feeling that needed no name, just needed to be cherished and pondered... if need be in lengthy essays on a hindi tv serial, even if people thought one was mad for doing that.

lovely writing and direction all through. episode was so thick with meaning and beauty and every kind of emotion... hate, love, nurturing, wonder, joy, sadness, sombreness, playfulness, comedy, an exciting sexual tension.

he said that and immediately noticed khushi was standing right there, she had overheard him.. she was reacting and he knew she was getting really emotional. tears in her eyes.

he attempted what he had to. a quick get away. by the way, has he grown even more lithe and there's a catlike grace to his movements which is causing fairly severe breathing problem this side of the screen.
she gave chase... he had to listen to her... he turned back and said, okay, tell me. she started saying what she waned to, clearly she was going to be nice.

could he risk that? his instincts leapt in to protect him khadoos asr man of dimag, just as he'd repeatedly moved with alacrity to shield her. the same momentum with which he'd suddenly turned and blocked her, he turned away and marched off... seems he didn't want to hear what she had to say.

of course, he didn't. it might touch him too much and no way could he let that happen.

such fascinating play of a so many subtle and not so subtle emotions of attraction across the episode.

she rushed after him and did something totally bizarre. she took the air out of his tyre with a hair pin. i felt all sorts of things coming through, led chiefly by a sense of extreme sexual tension that makes you almost giddy headed and you need some sort of release...

for the past two days they'd been too close too often... planning together, wholly immersed in a shared project, not being nasty, sensing each other's emotions, especially he could feel her many feelings for her family and was clearly moved... and just as by the poolside on diwali night there was the "wo sab" she didn't understand and that left her breathless, so also this caring protective man, gently asking her questions, there for her, apologising to her sis, saying she is not at fault.

it was all a bit too much.

something had to be done to go back to even keel... a little nafrat times. back to laad governor and sanka devi equation.

thwarted when she tried to be nice, khushi opted for nasty. and the tyre went flat. she stood grinning her head off, while he looked stunned then freaked out.

now you'll have to stay... she declared.

he swung out of his car and did some more of that lithe killer walk ending up right before her, angry and incredulous. what the f... went his angry voice, while his eyes grew most ungentle. are you crazy, he asked.

by now, her reply possibly didn't surprise him any more.

aap crazy, she retorted of course. he turned back to leave. i was intrigued. no real yelling again. he was really crazy, wasn't he? for her.

she did her sorry aur dhanyavad  bit. he stopped, rabba ve notes wandered in on a lilting note, a little inquisitive... asr looked at her quizzically.

yeah, he reminded me of mills and boon words a lot today.

when she said there's a reason for her weird words, he muttered under his breath since when does she need a reason to talk. sounded like  a possessive, smitten lover to me. his "isse" and "usse" sound so intimate, almost caressing. never have i heard the third person singular sound this endearment like. and that avoiding of all eye contact or conversation about his apology to payal... again it said he cared too much and needed to not be found out, by anyone else or even himself.

he couldn't help himself and began to smile a bit at what she'd said, when again sanka attack, she summarily wished him bye and told him to leave.

oh that look on his face when he processed this. that smile which said, she's crazy, ah well... i love her just like that whispered something amid all that shrug and bye and cocked head and amused half smile.

turned out, he didn't know how to change a tyre. they wrangled a bit over it, what! you can't change a tyre?! yeah so, big deal!

of course, the jalebi maker was also an expert tyre changer. she might not be able to push a car but change tyre she is expert at.

we went right back to the adversaries mode of lovers, a little aggression, skirmishes, constant contact of another kind, through anger, ire, irritation... but contact.

kids laughed at him, really why are kids constantly making fun of this man... anyway, they called him "uncle".

then she referred to him as uncle.

he was genuinely horrified.

she fixed the new tyre and prayed for a good and safe journey. obviously writers were dropping major isharas, hints about something...  a new track maybe? i was never good at understanding all this. so i just gawked at the fabulous romance.

she refused to say sorry to him. but khushi, he is also going to thank you for changing the tyre... not.

ha, the man had the last word.

such a game of love, this last word getting.

a young beautiful funny girl in tight churidar and a young totally handsome guy in formals, that too grey and white, changing a wide, heavy tyre together, well  he did help her roll it into place... all this looked unbelievably erotic and also cute at once. asr and khushi always evoke layered nuanced response.

she called a spanner... paana... the hindi for "to get". paana hai... need to get, she called out. kya paana hai? what do you need to get, he barked back, frowning. again much more than what was said, was said.



feeling arnav ji feeling episodes
episode rambles

episode 136 get the ishara?

koi kissise se milne wala hai...


janam janam ke liye, jiji!!

someone is going to meet someone... who?... for all their lifetimes, jiji!

one scene caught my entire attention and floored me this episode. it was a scene that had sort of made me pause and wonder when i first saw it, this time it seemed like the most significant part of story even though it lasted a few long seconds and there was nothing said.

as khushi went to close the door, a masculine hand, wrist covered in white, appeared and covered her fingers, it held a set of keys, car keys you could tell, it stopped the door from shutting. why did newton's laws of motion come to mind even if i barely recall them accurately, force, state of rest, motion, momentum, acceleration...

and the hand slowly pushed the door open.

khushi's eyes widened and her face held an expression one really couldn't read as arnav singh raizada came into view. slowly, deliberately and with unsmiling face. but even in his eyes there was a thing unfathomable, unusual. for a moment, time went calling on some other universe, and they stood vis a vis... just looking at each other.

then he took back the moment, brought it here and walked in almost brushing her aside.

there was a sense of a horizon opening out, some conversation happening in another plane... don't shut the door, i am here... who are you?... it's me... yes, it is you... shall we cross the threshold, go to our next universe... do you understand the ishara... are you here for all my lifetimes? koi kissise milne wala hai... janam janam ke liye...

the doorway has often been a place of story telling in ipk. almost like a border, a gateway to something new, wondrous. one can sense many meanings here or just the plain factual one, but i had a feeling the directors wanted us to read more, sense more. how carefully the shot is taken and edited. the depth of field almost not there as we see only the faces, the gazes, the touch, the stop, the wonder, the feeling of another space where only he and she exist, and a key and two hands colliding accidentally... but really there are no accidents... sometimes i think there's only you and me in this universe... kabhi kabhi mujhe lagta hai, khushi... he says that later.

this was certainly a space where only they were there... and all the laws of motion, as they whirled away igniting each other, in search of nothing and everything toward that inner utter peace.

that key... it looked terrifically masculine dangling from that sure, confident thumb. there was a maleness about it hard to describe or deny, her fragile long fingers never moved or jerked back, as if unconsciously prepared for that touch.

mannat ki chabi. there was always a key somehow symbolic, telling a story. doors were being opened, galaxies crossed, arnav singh raizada was stepping right up and meeting khushi kumari gupta, this was the ultimate chakkar, orbiting... love ka chakkar (as mano memorably said), the wheels and orbits of love.

pretty neat, the way of course on those words editor cut to asr and kkg looking at each other... while we were speaking of payal and akash's love.

the writers and directors had had fun telling the bit they had assigned to this episode. khushi was delighted and it of course manifested in a show of complete sanka... she jumped about and chirped what seemed like nonsense but wasn't and yes, ishara, sign, one of her fave words... writers possibly wanted us to read the ishara.

lifelong commitments were the topic of the day, ostensibly akash and payal's. but look a little away from mami's deadly pink and kundan ire, di's beaming delight, nani ji's gracious progressive words, payal's tremulous joy, akash's happy confusion, bua ji's astonishment, garima's stammering wonder and all you see is a girl in green with the widest grin and something in her eyes, a man flat out killer in white with that same something in his... this is forever.

tum door hi raho toh achha hai... if you stay away it's better, he may snap, but his eyes long for the reverse.

she's put haldi on his cuff. what could be symbolic of a shadi, a wedding.

no, he doesn't eat sweet, she chimes in quickly when bua ji goes to give him mithai.. yeah, she is the one who must watch out for him...

aasmaan, sky, akash.. her charade was all about somehow saying what she was told not to. amma didn't guess akash... but yes, aasmaan, paani tapak raha hai... rain, skies, a man called ocean...

ah allusions. the isharas.

the whole episode was rich in those things.

there was also the endearing straight talk of ipk on nani's lips, something indian serials rarely see... even mami spoke clearly about love/pasand, a family that values tradition but is not blind and mired in things irrelevant. love is a great reason to get married... there is acceptance of that and the positive idea that you still start belonging to each other's families and everyone's happiness is sought through the alliance.

nani saying, yes, mano darling is not pleased but they have "manay rahi" her... that she is nasty on the outside but a lovely person within, that she will keep her daughter in law happy... ah such straight and real talk. there's no doubt nani gives a lot of her directness, her strength, her attitude to her favourite angry grandson.

of course, most times i was passing out looking at asr and nothing registered.

today again khushi was beautiful... a glow almost in her and that wide eyed innocent yet strong appeal. her sunniness was out and bright and not at all affected. her complete dhakdhak sanka in the kitchen, ha ha ha, only kkg, only sanaya.

must say, payal and akash rather sweet. beautifully done sudden proposal by raizadas scene. and why don't we just bury the snake in that room... don't let him escape.


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episode 135 feeling or fact

farre anyone?

now if you are a hotshot drop dead gorgeous tycoon with a mind for cracking deals and getting people to do what you want, convincing them in ways fair and otherwise that what you say is a thing of profit, anything else is sure to lead to loss, what is the one thing you will most need when off to handle a tricky situation?

why, farre of course.

what farre? you may ask with imperious impatience.

you know, those cheating wala paper.

things have come to a head, akash is storming out of home, mami's refusal to accept payal as bahu has him in a frenzy and the whole family is stirred and desperate trying to bring calm back. everything is happening too fast.

as this dramatic scene unfolds, an episode with two classic ipk elements is coming together. humour and the contrasting philosophies of kkg and asr. one light and frothy, the other deeper and just as defining of their relationship as anything else.
that sizzle of comedy which barun and sanaya pulled off together, added immeasurably to the ajeeb love story of one arnav singh raizada and one khushi kumari gupta, and was very much a part of what made it all so sexy.

khushi urges asr to go quickly and save the situation... doing things her way, of course. this entails emotion, dramatic dialogue, not cool headed negotiation as is his wont. he is highly skeptical of the approach, but recent events have indicated that sometimes she gets it right... sort of.

sanaya deftly delivers a completely filmi khushi with great conviction and not a trace of hamming. khushi is genuinely a bit hindi phillum, she is a fan of salman khan... her solutions to problems tend to have celluloid sensibilities. recall the fully togged dulhan on bed strategy to ensnare asr into marrying la, or for that matter the selling of bangles to fill his office with plants in a bid to sway his decision. not into excel spreadsheet type analysis and strategies, our jhalli.

"haan haan ab hum miss manorma se miss-takewa ban gaye hain, humre har baat pe problem hi problem hai," yes yes, wails mami in ascending melodrama, now from miss manorama i have become mistake, whatever i say is a problem.

"aisan third kilas chhokariya se hum apan akas bitwa ke haippy marriage kaise kar de?" with such a "third class girl" how can i conclude a happy marriage for my akash. 

oh the tongue is sharper than those garden shears today, she's been hurt deep by this independence shown by her doting, gentle son, and his lack of interest in rich, upper class girls is absolutely intolerable. she has been that "third class girl" and has struggled all her life to clamber up the social rungs and hit super first kilass, and now her bitwa is all set to bring an ordinary girl home as wife. politically, this ruins her... her much cogitated plan being to get son hitched to a wealthy heiress, and improve her status and position in the family transitively: saas of rich bahu, something grand and irrevocable about that.

poor manorama, all the insecurities of being born poor, if only she were a little less crass and obvious. but then she wouldn't have been mami, would she. 

chaos in the living room. the two conspirators in these matters asr and khushi are absolutely on the same side, each for the happiness of their sibling watch from above.

go go and speak, this is the chance... khushi tells asr. "aur yad rakhiyega... jodiya... uparwala... kahin na kahin sab ke liye..." and remember... couples, the one up there... somewhere there's someone for everyone. 

uff the hooey. he turns away exasperated.

which is when she makes the farre offer. little cheat notes... of course, who can ignore such wiles... a girl who is willing to give you all her farres, got to give her at least your heart. what say, asr.

living room is tense. for a change, even mama ji is present and livid at his wife's antics.

"mami ji," starts asr.

"khushi ji, aap kab aayee?" khushi ji, when did you come, asks anjali close to tears.

asr begins to present his case... highly tutored by the one who knows about such matters. well at least, that's what she claims.

"arnav ji aap sab se kuch kahna chahte hain..." arnav ji wants to tell you all something. khushi takes position to guide him, her confidence and smugness are too good to watch, and all over her smile.

"mami ji, mujhe aap logo se yeh kahna tha ki..." mami ji, i wanted to tell you... he rushes a bit, very uncomfortable, this is too corny for him. but he is awww cute conveying that, yes khushi, i am cool with this hesitant, awkward asr.

"ka baat hai, arnav bitwa? humka bolne ke liye koi muhurat ka baiting karat ho ka?" mami is impatient, sharp; what's up, arnav bitwa, are you waiting for some auspicious hour to tell me?

"nahin, mami ji..." his rasp is back, his no nonsense air.

"main yeh kah raha tha ki woh upar..." i am saying that, er, that up - again he attempts feebly. charlie brown comes to mind, especially the expression or lack thereof on his face when lucy says really gluey silly things.

a lame finger points skyward... all are intrigued... upar? above? what's there? a classic comedy moment.

khushi interrupts... with gestures... not that, this... and a smiling pose.

valiantly, the karmayogi pushes on... "haan, jodia..." yes, couples, he blurts. funny man, no clue how to do this soppy stuff. arnav singh raizada yells screams shouts, makes deals not filmi speeches. that is princess jhalli's forte.

"ji, uh, har kissi ke liye koi na koi kahin na kahin..." er, for everyone... someone, somewhere or the other. everyone is looking more and more puzzled, what's happened to the boy? this is not going well at all... and a huge burst of laughter is pushing at my throat.

"i mean upar se..." i mean from above... the man is desperate now. 

"hello hi bye bye..." manorama is quick to grab the words and twist them to her own purpose. the bride and the groom that come from upar, above... they should be of the same upper class. equal status... 

"one taap one battam naahi chalat hai!" one top class another lower class won't work. not one to mince her words, our spitfire mami. so what if her thinking is crass, effete, and utterly erroneous.

akash needs miss india, not khoon bhari tang, mami is clear.

so how long will asr's patience last. aren't his eyes already showing signs of change? impatience? ownership? time for "enough"?

"par, mami ji..."

"phool istap, arnav bitwa... esab philmi talk batiyane ki koi jaroorat nahin hai..." full stop, arnav bitwa, no need for all this filmi talk. uh oh.

la tries: but mami ji, akash's choice is also important, isn't it?

mami won't listen to anjali, akash, la, anyone.

our man is losing it and getting in form. he walks off, and those little eye movements stay back in my head to torture me mercilessly.

at the poolside. he stands, concerned, even angry.

she walks up to him, and promptly says the wrong thing, "arnav ji, aapne theek se nahin..." arnav ji, you didn't say it right.

"just shut up, khushi..." he whirls around. furious. in seconds he is the confident, on top of everything man we know.

"maine tumse pahle hi kaha tha... yeh jodia... koi kahin... ye sab..." i'd told you before... all this couples, somewhere someone... all this...

gritted teeth... supremely nasty yet utterly gorgeous, yet another asr trademark.

"yeh sab phaltoo ki baatein hain... it's nonsense." 

if there's one person on earth who doesn't balk at his clenched jaw, angry voice, it's miss filmi. she insists, "agar aap ne thodi bhavna ke saath, mehsoos karke kaha hota toh..." if you had said those things with feelings... and she gets even more movie-ish, reminding me of the cliched creative flakepot as she completes, "feeling, arnav ji, feeling!"

"mujhe mat sikhao apni yeh stoopid feelings aur lines!" don't teach me your stupid feelings and lines. but arnav ji, those feelings, stoopid or not, you are already swimming in helplessly... the jodi has been made it seems, somewhere it appears there's someone meant for everyone, even the heartless khadoos businessman whose strategies never fail.

"hum naahin agreeangey!" mami ji shrieks she will not agree. her husband reminds her of her background, that lowly status she has so longed to obliterate... things escalate. and in no time, mami is leaving home. mama ji decides to call her bluff and doesn't stop her, she is out of the house, hoping someone will call her back, too troubled to give in on her own. emotions are all in a mess, hysteria lurks everywhere.

out walks the cool suave tycoon.

"mujhe apne tareeke se handle karna hai," i will handle it my way, he's decided.
"problem koi bhi ho... professional ya personal... solution ek hi hota hai... aur solution kissi feelings ya dil se nahin aata... solution aata hai power aur paise se..." whatever may be the problem, professional or personal, the solution doesn't come from some feeling... it comes from power and money.

sexy cool voice, a graze of tiredness lacing it, and a certain authority that comes from tackling the din and grime of real life every day.

"yeh ek language hai jo sabko samajh aati hai," this is one language everyone understands.

i feel a sudden sense of sadness for this young man... what a lesson life has taught him. those who haven't had a difficult childhood will perhaps never gauge all its implications. this icy hardness was there in vijay verma too. remember "deewar," one of our first meetings with the classic angry young man? in him that aching need to be loved and freed of pain too. in deewar, the atheist was made to finally stand before god and beg for his mother's life, and then he had to die. we were not ready maybe for any other end. but this time round, asr will be able to stay non theistic and look forward to a life with the innocent mad utterly theistic love of his life. they did try to kill him, but we would have none of that. vijay verma would have been proud of asr. 

"got it..." he walks away.

this is the asr position. across from it sits kkg's belief... emotions matter. who's right who's wrong. i think the writers went with both. depends on the situation. 

in this case, asr was right. his smart taut conversation with his mami gave her the scenario succinctly. think with your dimaag, not dil. walk out now, and the position you've built over years is gone in a trice. make peace with the inevitable, use it to your advantage, you'll rule. mami understands this language, as his instincts told him she would.

and mano darling is back.

but before he went out to get mami, he showed his sweetest side without even realising it. his nani was collapsing as he came into the living area, in a second he was the loving, concerned grandson. held her tenderly, walked her to a seat, made sure she was ok, even di was not given priority at this point, he knew who was most perturbed by all this.

then arnav singh raizada strode out to get his family back in order. on the day he'd quietly bought his mami the necklace she desired, he showed he new her heart. today he proved he knew her head.

he is coolly triumphant.

she smiles a "see, i told ya," smile, still believing it was her idea that worked. 

no, i did nothing the way you said, "tumhara yeh khayal hi stoopid hai ki yeh duniya emotions par chalti hai," this very thought of yours is stupid that the world runs on emotions.
people understand "faida" and "nuksan", profit and loss... not "dil" and "jazbaat", heart and emotional considerations. 

mise en scene cleverly etched a little advance retreat at this point.

"ek baar phir tum galat nikli aur main sahi..." once again you were wrong, and i right. asr music. then that walk up the stairs, leaving all behind, ascending.


feeling arnav ji feeling episodes
episode rambles