i went to
my imgur albums looking for an edit from episode 64. the one i posted on
jashn. a couple of years ago i had made and uploaded caps from star player i
realised. as i scrolled down, i could feel my gaze wanting to linger, to
stop... i could almost see the episode... and that thrill stored in the
memory, rise... unedited shots... i wanted to stay and stare.
how pristine and wonderful these two look... and the communication without saying anything.
he
rages, she is taken aback, close to tears, but not shattered... that
magnificent walk away from him and his insults... and something in his
eyes noting he is not feeling fine about everything he is doing...
the
fight with di, the need to see her happy, the roiling of emotions, the
angry arrogant barge into gh, the slapping down of wads of notes, the
stupendous communication between the two without saying a word...
the sheer beauty.
there was story, there were real people, and was the acting fabulous.
there
really was no way of making it ordinary, conventional... its mainspring
challenged norms, social mores. in the most fascinating ways. that made
it precious and ipk.
just look at them.
more coming up...
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fanfiction
how do you express a feeling that is confusing? one that almost unexpectedly comes upon you and leads you to a strange moment? a feeling that puts you in a quandary, no idea what exactly it might be or why it's there at all. yet you just feel it and don't seem to mind, even though you frown.
how do you say all that while staring at a camera... without a single word... maybe a flashback once in a way to aid the viewer, but really... even without those flashbacks, would i have not known arnav singh raizada's state of mind? i hope to see this actor soon in a role that demands everything of him that he can give... for even just watching it feels like one is in a strange and wonderful place.
episode 50 of doors and dupattas
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fanfiction
the blog is a little messed up. pictures have disappeared. so i try and to fix
it almost every day. which means i see the edits closely again as i find
them, upload to imgur, add them back to the posts... every day i find
myself stopping and staring at the shots. often not very good edits. and
i wonder, did we really see this level of acting on tv? i can actually
feel my heart do funny things, just looking at stills. remember this
episode? a man walking away and creating his own space, standing there,
recalling things, his whole body tense, arching. his thoughts
concentrating and a sense of sahi and galat swamping all... and
something else... something he doesn't understand, yet it holds him in
its grip. he has just brought his girlfriend home, he has offered to
show her his room, he has defended her right to be treated with courtesy
and have her own way of looking at life no matter how different... and
every now and then a girl who shouldn't matter slips into his mind,
makes him think, feel, yearn... a rewind button is spoken of. something
tells you he wished he had one. no words, just a young untrained actor
before a camera on a frantic set in a hindi soap. no pampering. no star
treatment. just a tv lead. he yanks me to moments i didn't even know an
actor could... or anyone else for that matter. these scenes were well
constructed and written, but minus that acting...
this was a jodi like none i've ever seen. a quality of something
igniting, combusting, catching fire. and yet there was laughter and
intelligence and candour and fun in it. even the thought of one thinking
of the other is sensuous, almost erotic, bringing on colonies of
butterflies in the stomach.
i liked what and how he felt for lavanya. there was no disrespect in it,
none. and you see that very thing so often, when it comes to an
independent girl who takes decisions about her own life, earnings,
sexuality herself. in fact, if anything, he respected lavanya. found
something in her that was like him.
having seen all he had and that
fractious broken relationship of his parents, having felt the ache of
losing his mother which he just couldn't deal with, he had gone into a
shell, backed away from romantic notions of love, even marriage. yet he
was adult and intelligent enough to know, he would want a relationship,
just that he wasn't looking for one that took over his life. one where
there was affection and desire and yes, respect, but no expectation of a
lifetime of love and commitment, such as marriage...
and that was what he felt he could have with lavanya.
he liked her, he valued her, but no, he didn't have that swamping
emotion for her, one that took over your mind and inundated your heart.
and got settled deep in all of you.
not being involved with her from
those parts of us that spell love, he didn't pick on the fact that she
had crossed the limits they had both perhaps set for their relationship,
the boundaries... that she was crossing over to the side of... love.
one of the best scenes and most complex that i have ever seen must be
the one where he rails at lavanya for her bride on the bed tactic, and
when he says, yeah, he didn't care for her that's why he brought her to
live with him, in his home.
and the other... that moment, where he
realises, no matter how much he may value lavanya, how much he has done
the right thing by her, how both of them had wanted the same thing, but
at this moment what he is doing, how he is feeling about khushi, all
that confused, extreme response to her... he is not really doing the
right thing by lavanya.
the story of asr and la could have been
written in a million different ways. i am so glad it was done the way it
was. true to both their characters. it showed a beautiful flow of
feelings in a girl who never really had planned for it and how it
gradually made her understand things... grow up... find more of herself.
and it told me so many things about this dashing, handsome, clever, cool, deep, clean hearted, sahi, and vulnerable man.
episode 47 saansey ruk jaygi
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saansey ruk jaygi episodes
episode rambles
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