Saturday, 30 January 2016

episode 93 where are you going 1



"i know... file saath la raha hoon, dammit," clenched teeth, irritated grey look, eyes cold with a glint of fire, the man is in a foul mood. which of course is always pleasing. he's going alone. not really, just that his companion is lying unconscious in the boot. right next to the pakoda. went to nainital in a bus on a school excursion at 13, for only rs. 70. never thought some day i would return to this trip, quite this way.

  
where does a journey begin? where does it end? did this one start with a man in a bad mood rushing into a car and turning on the ignition? or did it actually take off with a girl on a scooter, a boy in a helicopter, each seeking a destination, one fine day in lucknow? the city of bhoolbhulaiya, of getting lost to find your way.


or perhaps it began in another plane, beyond even the writer's imagination, far far away, where truth meets truth and knows love to be its only destination.

khushi didn't find what she went seeking that day, asr almost made it, then things went awry. yet both had found their destination, only they had no idea of it. with a trip and fall, and a snap of pearl string, started another journey that would go via surprising routes, dangerous detours, ups, downs, ins and outs, avoid potholes and head on collisions somehow to bring us here.

forty four odd minutes on the road, intercut with the plot and sub plots moving smartly along. shyam and babu ji taking crucial steps toward hospital, payal and akash being aided by la's cluelessness and nani ji's not easy to please nature, then there's bua ji's delusion so necessary for everything. lovely little touches, babu ji gives payal his phone, so when he needs it, it's not there. right through, everyone keeps asking where's khushi. la is the first to find out. clever.
nainital is but a minor trip missed by her alas, she will also be the first to know whom asr wants with him on the journey of life. she'd planned much for the other one, but like an intelligent driver, she will figure out when the road is no longer hers and look for another route.

a strain of ajeeb stalked the episode. yes, i thought, life is indeed an ajeeb, strange, journey and if any of the writers was thinking this while devising an episode so focused on taking us forward toward the next destination of story, i'd be delighted.

khushi believes that devi maiyya takes you by the hand and leads you down your life path. yet, i can't quite see dm coming up with that jhatka plan to make some "love" time for la and asr. make pakoda, take out petrol from tank, en route to an urgent meeting trip up the man, grab him in a snuggle by nowhere and chomp pakoda... would do wonders for the relationship of the girl she's employed to help.


khushi was acting with free will. 

dm just spiked it all so that it was she who was left in the middle of nowhere with the man diverted permanently, not quite snuggling (that's for later), but ploughing through pakodas relentlessly.

really, the dabba never left her hand. the eating never stopped. only once, when she leapt out to push the car, did the white dabba get a respite from her firm grip.



she loves jalebi, he loves pakoda. both so deep fried, juicy, crunchy without, flowy within, just that one is sweet and one savoury. like some people we know. pakoda with its chilli hot anger, jalebi with its swirls of sanka. but looks like the lover of jalebi is equally sold on pakoda. i mean, should you regain consciousness and find yourself trapped in the boot of a moving car would you scream and shout on one hand yet keeping munching through loads of pakoda? of course, no stopping your constant chatter either, "laad gov ki gaadi bilkul unhi ki tarah hai... jab dekho paa paa, har waqt horn bajate rahta hai," laad gov's car is exactly like the man, making noise all the time, the horn is forever on.

no wonder the man was completely thrown when he opened the boot. firstly, she is there, secondly... have a pakoda?



    "what the..." was there an eff... there?


she looks startled then. "aa... aap na zyada what the what the mat kijiye... hum aap ko batate hain ki kya hua..." she still doesn't know la isn't there. was she all set to offer la the crunchy tempters the moment she came out of the trunk? strange.

so what are you doing here? c'mon, asr, stop glaring, she just wanted to leave some goodies for you and la in the trunk.

so you went and sat in the trunk? i am guffawing at asr's dead panning here.

no it was the dupatta. but of course, now there possibly is a mingling of your desires, khushi, and dm's little plan, a weapon of both... the dupatta.

"toh aap akele jaa rahen hain?" so you're going by yourself? she's realised la is not around.

"aisa lag toh nahin raha hai." doesn't look like that. droll.

"dekhiye aap iss tarah se humse baat mat kijiye." see don't talk to me like that. a sexy contrast between salt and sweet, worldly and cutesie.

"hum taxi leke chale jaayenge," i'll take a cab and go.

"haan, sab taxi wale toh tumhara intezaar kar rahe hain na," yes of course, all the cabbies are waiting just for you.

man is supremely irritated. he is running late. work matters to this guy. it is what gives him his strength, tethers him to this life, gives energy, drive, a reason for passion.

"koi taxi kyun nahin aa rahi, " why isn't a taxi coming... she's so very 18 years old, angry yet a dependence on him in her grouchy tone.

what, a strike? how will she go home.

"gadi mein baitho," sit in the car. why is it always so intimate this asking her to get into his car?

"kya... aap hume chorenge?" what, you're going to take me?

"aur nahin toh kya, beech sadak tumhe chhorke..." what else, will i leave you midway and...

in an instant the whole complexion of the moment transforms. and the memories crowd in... that night he had left her in the middle of nowhere and driven away...

journeys... what crazy turns they take.

"jaldi gaadi mein baitho, mere paas time nahin hai," quickly sit in the car, i don't have time. he takes the moment back again and brings us here on the road to nainital.

sorry i made a mistake, she says. check next time to see with whom what mistake you make, replies he.

"itna dekh sakte toh humse galat kyun hoti..." if i could see so much, why would i make mistakes... the road lies before us all, yet how much of it can we really see. sometimes what feels like an unnecessary detour or even loss of way may be really the path we were supposed to take.

he looks at her, a strange feeling in his eyes. all these unexpected answers.

he will not get lost, he yells, hurry up.

she will not make a mistake so she  marches obediently to the boot while he strides to the passenger door to open it for her. hand reaches up for pin, and the left right jhatka ditty on tip of tongue no doubt. he is flabbergasted beyond belief. what the really. his eyes say, you're really ajeeb as she comes to the door held open.



a dark brooding asr looks ahead and drives, avoiding any contact with the pestilence on the passenger seat. she munches pakoda. even offers him one. a glare does the trick. in a perfectly enacted and edited shot he tells "lalit" he'll be late, a problem's come up. problem is upset halfway through munch.

and so continues the drive to where who knows. along the way, the petrol will get over, but naturally. asr will wonder how that could be. khushi will cringe remembering how. khushi will assure asr that she is woman enough to push a car.

"hum bhi dhakka denge," i will push the car also. and she gets that look from him again.

"tum." you. a slightest movement of head, a darkening look in eyes, a little turn in her direction, a quiet downward slanted, ending on fullstop, question mark, and exclamation mark all together... tum. and why do i feel a funny indulgent air in him. of course anger and disbelief, and dismissive a note.



he will look drop dead gorgeous and push the car anyway. of course, because she was so concentrating on not moving the steering wheel instead getting him to push more to the left, more to the right, etc., she will not notice how ahem dhakdhak the man looked straining to move a whole huge car.

when asr is tired and sweaty, and the petrol pump is nowhere in sight (maybe dm moved it a bit away from its original location), khushi's sassiness will earn her a harrumph asr and the right to push the car. she will do so, with aplomb. the more you stay in the same place, the longer the distance you cover. if i'm to critically appreciate the look on asr's face as he stands watching her "push" the car, i'd say she'd done a huge bit of travel straight into the centre of the dimaag man's dil.

unbelievable, his stance said. it was its way of saying "adorable," maybe?



ah well, moving on. there will be a tyre puncture (seriously, dm is leaving nothing to chance, taking over now on, asr thought he was writing his own destiny, up to a point he was, this nainital trip was his plan after all, but having seen the opportunity, fate/dm/life call it what you will had stepped in deftly for some navigation control).

no amount of pakoda bribe will get them a lift in either direction, delhi or nainital.

somewhere along the way, aman would be introduced. hello, aman, bhelcomes bhelcomes. and in the comedic turn of this loony day, we'll laugh about whom asr called idiot, fool, and other such endearing things. then la would call, serving the biggest purpose of all. she will demand to speak to khushi and khushi wouldn't know how to hook on a blue tooth. so of course a beautiful brown hand will tuck back a strand of hair and put this little remote device on her ear. never before has the remote brought anyone so near.



dhakdhakdhakdhak. rabba vey tenderly traipsing in, in no hurry to get anywhere, almost telling the two to relax, sit back, enjoy the ride. sometimes the ride is the destination, indeed. khushi's eyes would reflect her sudden disquiet. but asr's will rest on her face just for a moment. still, just looking, inscrutable. 


finally, fed up with everything, asr will decide to walk through the woods and khushi will be brave and refuse; then canny and give in. up will come the most incredible stalking of the man. sweet and hot lost in a forest with woody trees, bare brown earth and quietly descending mist, the very thought feels erotic. is that why khushi talks even more than usual, and asr is practically running? have to give super applause to the dialogue writers of khushi today. what might have become too obvious or irritating, became charming prattle, at times loaded with exciting nuance. she is talking loud and without pause it seems to fool the animals, but hey, look, a mango tree, wonder if there are any mangoes? a luscious fruit and love of it in the midst of nowhere, a sensual note floats up and plays with the swirls of mist.

he's had it. you must stop talking or your salary shall be cut by half. can you do five minutes of keeping quiet? just five.

thank g she's shut up, looks like the threat of pay cut worked.

but... where are you khsuhi... khushi?

"i don't believe this. mujhe pata hai tum mere peechhe hi ho, khushi kumari gupta"... i know you're right behind me, kkg.

"jaldi saamne aao." come in front quickly. his voice is rough, tired, on edge.

"this is not funny." and in a trice, i'm on a cliff top months down the line. his voice wobbly, desperate, pleading as she lies lifeless in his arms. that journey too began here. his voice not yet that shaken, but signs of it there already.

khushi, last chance, if this is some rotten joke of yours, shall take your whole salary.

silence. quiet, endless woods, "the woods are lovely dark and deep," but where is she? she who is afraid of the dark, of speeding cars, who sits in the boot and chews pakoda, who pushes the car with all her might and doesn't budge it a millimetre, yet who seems to move everything within him without even touching him with a finger? where...those wild animals she was talking about...

khushi?

khushi?

khushi?

khushi...



  
"let your mind start a journey through a strange new world. leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. let your soul take you where you long to be... close your eyes let your spirit start to soar, and you'll live as you've never lived before." ~~~ erich fromm ~~~

playing in my head as he searched in the swirling mist, the thickening fog, a song from the movie, "dhundh," and the thought... where does  a journey begin, where does it end? does it ever end? when we lose our way, is it really losing or a way to find our true destination? where were they headed that day in lucknow? to sheesh mahal, to nainital, to each other? will the fog ever clear?


"sansar kee har shay kaa itna hee fasana hai
ek dhundh se aana hai ek dhundh me jana hai

yeh rah kaha se hai yeh rah kaha tak hai
yeh raj koyee rahee samajha hai naa jana hai

ek pal kee palak par hai theharee huyee yeh duniya
ek pal ke jhapakane tak har khel suhana hai

kya janey koyee kis pal kis mod par kya bite
iss rah me ai rahee har mod bahana hai"



a few stray diversions that caught my eye

~ akash khushi aloo talks. another kind of love journey, i suppose. not all of them need people to shout ENOUGH and crash you into their ...

~ mami ji, "arre hum kya dephective hai ki hamka pata hui ki oo kahan hai?" am i defective that i should know. nice hintwa. even better, la's little general knowledge service, "mami ji, it's detective." but manorama wins the day with, "bhatebher."

~ payal says, whenever she's late from there, there's always gadbad. everything will be ok na? sorry payal, lots of gadbad coming up.

~ "isska matlab mausa ji hamari soch se kai zyada tez nikle," says shyam, this means mausa ji's thinking is sharper than mine. unfortunately, this will spell doom for shashi ji, for shyam's worst side is stirred when he thinks he can't get the better of you. 



that song from the 1973 film dhundh.

credit: uploader




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