flashback 34

this business of he's thinking of her, she of him, with those carefully selected and edited flashbacks, not a unique device... most hindi soaps use it... but these guys just got it so right. on a rewatch too they're beautiful. there was some sort of a vibe between the two actors, it rides every frame i feel, making them say many things, things below the surface, things a khushi and an asr tell each other, feel, share, get thrust into, can't run away from, want desperately... there are so many emotions in there. what say. just with a key and a couple of beads, again nothing new, such a hauntingly crafted moment. each memory carefully chosen, and their expressions as if tied to each other, in a taut dance move or something. she remembers call him and him turning, cold eyes. she remembers too he was nasty as hell but she wants to meet him one more time, he keeps thinking of that moment when he'd behaved terribly, lost control, and the eyes of a girl turning slowly around.

episode 34 i am not ok

g.u.e.s.t.h.o.u.s.e.  e.p.i.s.o.d.e.s

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episode rambles

fan fiction

a new world

when i started watching iss pyaar ko, i had no idea online forums existed for tv shows and there feisty, fast and furious conversations went on about hindi soaps. then ipk started going strange, khushi's ott post marriage. i was disturbed, i'd watch the show sitting on my bed all by myself every weekday midnight... the witching hour. it was my absolutely happy and giddy time. so when things went wonky, first i yelled and shouted at my husband. 

he had never seen me watch hindi serials before, and certainly not with this absorption. he had no idea what to do with the whole situation. thankfully, after years of living together people start getting each other i think. i remember he'd say to me in soothing tones, not to worry, things would come around. they didn't. so i came here, to the net... to india-forums. 

i'd chanced upon its name while listening to noreen khan's first interview with barun. a forum? really? what did they do out there? i didn't know. but i needed solace. and since i didn't have an suv, nor jalebi making skills, i went to this unknown place. i was astounded and thrilled at what i saw. so much fun and action and so many girls posting constantly, some funny, some deep, some totally witty, some angry, some militant, all clearly besotted with ipk.

met wonderful people. there was crooner, lovely girl called honeypriya (yeah, everybody had their own forum names... i giggled at the very thought, then settled on indi52) ran the thread. that gracious invite to join in the chat, i'll never forget. got to know great girls and then one fine day (no not a fine day, but anyway) iss pyaar ko ended.

three years now almost... 

undeterred a group of us started watching again.

when i came to the forum, i barely knew how to post. but thanks to everyone and that collaborative happy atmosphere, i learned a lot. till one day i was making edits, vms, gifs... oh many many many thanks to all my wonderful teachers.

and so it was, that along with writing long super long takes, i started making edits, very basic to somewhat more complex. like the ones above and below. i hope you enjoy these. 

a whole new world ipk gave me, i had no idea that would happen when on an unmarked midnight i saw a young man in a grey suit walk toward a young woman in a red saree and just could not look away.

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those teej episodes
episode rambles
fanfiction

tu hi bata

hospital hug episodes

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fan fiction

on the bridge

mbc bollywood has started airing "season two", that is episode 246 onward. reminded me of those difficult days and that magnificent fight on the way home. aur apni aankhon se dekha hai tum dono ko ek saath... ek dusre ki baahon mein... chhap gaya hai mere dimaag mein woh pal, jab maine tumhe aur... he can't finish the sentence.

episode rambles 
fan fiction

 

a hero and a heroine

in the arab world, wherever mbc bollywood reaches, the season two of iss pyaar ko has just started. iss pyaar ko had no seasons. looks like episode 246... suicide... onward, it's being presented as another season. not a favourite episode and yet some phenomenal acting in it. moments that stick in the mind. the show has been a huge success even though it's dubbed. doesn't surprise me, it's that kind of show.

barun is in dubai as part of the promotions i guess, he's looking wonderful and very reminiscent of asr. after a long time the hair is cut, combed, the stubble perfectly shaved, dapper suit instead of casuals, even a pocket square at times, and a certain air that's just maddeningly gorgeous. hollywoodish i keep thinking.

and sanaya is doing her thing in jhalak 8. so good as charlie chaplin just the other day. she always had a way with the funny stuff. strange, i thought, she too in a hollywood great mode, being charlie.
these two have brought me so much fun and joy and sleepless nights, either watching youtube in a loop or agonising over story going awry. how could she... how could he... etc., many conversations with myself.

these are two fine actors. today i missed them keenly. good to see both looking so engaged. the future, tomorrow, words like that flying through my head. they were my hero and heroine for a year and a half, every weeknight, some saturdays too, there never will be such supreme pagalpan again.

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because you don't 

have a character episodes

episode rambles

fanfiction

episode 173 "a" for arnav

"kiske naam ka akshar likhwana hai?" the letter of whose name, asks the mehendi maker of khushi 

"arnav ji ka?" khushi reacts to the saree clad nk and akash's claim that this whole idea was asr's. 

beautiful confusion... maradona like i feel like saying, "hand of god,"

whatever it was, this mistake is the finest kind of aphrodisiac that will take two people all the way to arousal and an act. mehendi definitely will bring colour. and leave us in a bit of a state, trying to hold on to the hue, hoping it never fades.

compliments to writers... how perfectly a desired end point was reached without anything seeming forced or laboured. that "a" needed to reach that palm. how terrifically erotic it made the play of two hands in water, the conversation in a kitchen, and the feelings a girl is trying hard to hide... it made a predator hungry for his prey, the prey quiver for her killer... a simple "a" and look what it set off.  

 

not by chance i think someone's name begins with aleph, alpha, the hindi "uh," the first letter.

just realised his name begins with the first hindi vowel "uh" of "uh aa e ee" and hers with the first consonant "kuh" as in "kuh khu guh ghu". all "u"s pronounced as in "u" in "but." okay, she is technically a khu, but it still begins on the k sound... somehow when asr says her name, i always hear the "k" for an instant till it opens out to "kh."

so he begins the sacred vowel sounds. aum, the ancient pure word for the eternal, begins with, guess what, "a" of course.

and she begins the consonants that give body/frame to words.
 
here's a bit on "a" from wiki: 

"Alpha (uppercase ', lowercase ; Greek: lpha) is the first letter of the Greek alphabet. In the system of Greek numerals it has a value of 1. It was derived from the Phoenician letter aleph Letters that arose from alpha include the Latin A and the Cyrillic letter A. 

In English, the noun "alpha" is used as a synonym for "beginning", or "first" (in a series), reflecting its Greek roots." 

i learn "kappa" or k in the greek alphabet is the tenth letter with a value of 20... derived from the phoenician "kaph," then i read something that makes me smile, so i share:
"~ in differential geometry, the curvature of a curve is given by K.
~ in physics, the torsional constant of an oscillator is given by K as well as einstein's constant of gravitation."

curvature, gravitation, thank g for science otherwise how would we understand love.
 
"a", aleph, alpha, hindi/sanskrit "uh" are dense with meaning and essence... will mention just the hebrew one. emet, which means truth and is mentioned by some sages when they say "the seal of god is truth," begins with "aleph".  of course there's esoteric thought there and a play with letters and ideas i am not too clear about.
arnav, i am guessing begins with the same letter. of course, there is the "i am the alpha and the omega..." of christian theology, and more. "a" i have a feeling was not there by chance. even if you look at no reference... "a" is always the first, the beginning. and that is thrilling enough.

when nani ji commands that arnav bitwa be sent downstairs for this rule breaking idea, khushi is in palpitations immediately... "hey devi maiyya hume phir se unki shakl nahin dekhni... hamari dhadkan bad jayegi..." hey dm, i don't want to see his face again, my breath will quicken...

so khushi does know what asr does to her, and it is exciting: heady, crazy, almost forbidden... and she loves it yet it catapults her into a mess. because maybe, she in her safety and stability idealising middle class world has never heard of such tumultuous feelings for a man.

there is no reference to this. just as asr has no real way of knowing love since he has banished it at a young age, so does khushi, who has some idea of love, not have any notion of this electric, invasive, untrammelled sensation that rides through her at the mere mention of his name, and of course when she sees him.

that it is part of love... she is still to know perhaps.

at this point it is a sensation. one she feels she has to somehow control... that is why he makes her so "pareshan". poor girl, i do feel for her, imagine being hunted by that man and completely in his thrall.

her vision is of an edifying love with taarey/stars falling in her anchal, his face appearing everywhere, but this uncontrollable dhakdhak... the feeling with a license to roam everywhere, all over her body and spirit and thought (does anyone remember a godrej crowning glory soap ad with dimple saying she uses it "just all over my body," sorry thought popped up, felt a bit khushi like vis a vis this feeling of hers) ... this feeling unnerves her, a frenetic edge to it.

what a lovely stage to be in.

"chhote ko ho kya gya..." what's happened to chhotey these days, wonders anjali, doing things he never did.

funny part of course is that he didn't do what everyone thought he did, yet he does indeed do things he never would earlier. like that dance... anjali is wondering... hopefully this will help her connect dots.the episode really played up a state of mind. of a lover in the grip of  a feeling... almost in a tango with it really. how it made her twirl through fear worry panic, leap into frenzy, gaze into her emotion, embrace it finally, and talk incessantly to her goddess, her friend, her own hidden recessed self constantly. who was dm really, i have often wondered.

asr was never there physically yet always there, in her thoughts, her sensations, her furrowed brow, her chatter with dm, her looking around, her catching di's worry, her questions, her desperate calls, her pacing, her feeling terrible that what she said about praying to dm so that she doesn't have to see his shakl may have come true.

arnav is nowhere to be found...

now kkg is really worried.

"chhotey kabhi aisa nahin karte! akhir wo gaye kahan?" chhotey never does this, where has he gone? di is reaching panic. di is like this when it comes to her bro... and husband.

but khushi is slowly getting worried the way a family member does... in fact, as the minutes pass, her emotions reach a turmoil that feels even higher than di's. i loved this "confession" writers opted for. no one ever says the word, but if this is not love, what is.

kkg paces.

akhir woh hai kahan? where is he, wails di.

and khushi recalls her "pareshan" dialogue, she had prayed to dm that...

"par humne toh aise hi kah diya tha..." but i said it just like that... what a supreme kkg moment. she didn't mean it. looking at him looking so gorgeous at the door step, dripping with asr sexiness and those invisible killing pheromones, his "hi" almost doing her in, and all the dhakdhaks from the night before, she'd just shot back at him in defence... she didn't mean it, oh goddess, please don't take her seriously.

"hey dm, ye bewakoofi mein humne jo maga aapne woh ichha poori toh nahin kar di?" hey dm, in my foolishness what i asked for, you didn't fulfill that wish, did you?

the parallel play of manorama trying to hold on to her place, grabbing mehendi wali, saree, jewellery, being nasty and childish as h carries on. really this mother in law/daughter in law thing is always tricky. whether you're as basic as mano or sophisticated and well educated.

two hours have passed... nani is asking for patience.. di is crying.. khushi is talking to him in her mind.

she can't take it any more. why isn't he picking up his phone... but even if he did, what would she tell him? what the?

she is so immersed in this, even payal's worried face and mano's tantrums can't take her away from it for too long. she has to has to reach him.

missing her pareshan man.

"nahin nahin hume janna bahut zaroori hai," no no it's very important that i know what's with him.

then another lovely khushi moment...

but why? i only told him to go away... beautiful little pause... all the feelings you can't put in words there... these are the signs of a feeling we call love. specific things in it. specific tremors, apprehensions, graspings, longings.

"pata nahin aap kahan"... come back... i am worried... dm, don't make my words come true...

"dial kiya gaya number iss waqt maujood nahin hai," the dialled number is not available...

again pace.

if he's not picking up the phone why am i so worried... hey dm, i just want that he should be ok, that's all... conflicting thoughts around one clear emotion.

but if he should reply... what will i say?

"kehna kya hai... maafi mang lenge... hum dil se maafi maangte hain."

dil se maafi, ask forgiveness from the heart.

and she comes to her heart finally, bringing her feelings from all the places they've run amok in to the centre of it all, their right place, their rightful place. the heart. where only one person sits, reigns really, now.

and it is not by chance again, i am sure that he appears at that precise moment. she senses him, and turns. she can always sense him now... just that in the dressing room her nerves were so frazzled, they thought he was jiji, really kkg, your writers did know you well.

there he stands. that expression on his face. i thought my heart would stop beating. really what was that look. again a hunger, a terrible need, a stillness that intensifies it all. then it turned to something else. but that look... where was that from asr, and why?

t h e  l a g i  s h a r t  e p i s o d e s

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episode rambles 
fan fiction

episode 172 on a "hi"

interesting structure of episode. started with a scorpion failing at its task... anjali actually used her bare hand to brush it away from her beloved husband's back. this character has a note of hysteria when it comes to her pati dev and her brother and their well being, no doubt reminding us of her fear of losing her loved ones.

a direct result of this, asr insisted that di go nowhere, sit right there at rm, which meant, mehendi must shift to shantivan.

and so it was that a beauteous maiden in beige and pink with appropriate touches of gota, large pink earrings and hair left loose, just the way someone likes it, came to the doorway, munching jalebi; a telltale, actually tell epic sign of worry and pareshani.

her bua ji had just declared that she was coming with loads of things, in a state of "laaden phaaden". looked like most of that she carried on her mind, the rest in a few light carry bags. so what ails the lovely sister of the bride, why does she mutter early in the day and hog on jalebis and look woebegone?

as if to answer this very question, appeared a vision. brushed back hair, fresh after bath early morning look, sparkling white shirt, sleek waist coat and trousers, our man in rm has suddenly decided he needs to shut the main door... and who should he find there, but the fair one in distress.

so many times before they've met at this very place, each time at a different stage of knowing, feeling, hating, wanting, desiring each other. a doorway is a lovely place, neither in, nor out, a sort of no man's land, anything goes here.

what ensued was delightful romance, a little stalking, playing, flirting, making crazy. the essential excitement between a man and a woman, the thing that makes us sigh and want to fall in love.

"devi maiyya, rakshaa karna... hume bahut dar lag raha hai," the fearless sanka devi had just prayed to her goddess, she was very scared. scared of what? "main tumhe kha toh nahin jaaoonga," i won't eat you up, he'd said the night before... and yet she feared. i wonder what scared her really.

"matlab... dar nahin lag raha hai, lekin agar humne..." i mean, i'm not scared, but if i... she stood there, eyes closed, talking to herself, jalebi in hand.little soft breeze on hair, eyes open and... and another light gust of breeze... worrying that... big bite of jalebi. obelix and magic potion come to mind. maybe when she was a baby she fell into a cauldron full of orange syrupy swirls... maybe jalebi gives her some magical strength... she can take on the whole world, especially that rakshas, laad governor, heartbreakingly good looking dancer whom she just so wants to look at and... and dance with maybe?

and he's right there about to shut the door... face to face they stand, a sweet silence full of tease and tremble.

then the vision uttered just one simple word and devastated girl and viewer alike.

how can anyone make "hi" sound so heavenly. lethal.

the effect was apparent on miss laaden phaden. her eyes looked at him startled...

"na... na... namaste,"  she stammered, little smile.

shudh bhasha time. madam is not going to hi and bye.

he looked at her, a little awkwardness, the silence so delicate, then...

"saman dene aayi ho..." his voice was smooth and gentle, he wanted to look at her, he was reveling in it practically, a few moments with her, felt precious maybe.

"nahin..." she's nervous, he's pleased... "matlab... ha... an..." no... i mean yes, says she.

oh the nervousness in her... how he messes with her mind. khushi needs to find her answer to this havoc.

khushi gave giving a wide berth a whole new definition as she almost reached the border of haryana to avoid being anywhere near him as she walked past.

being near was dangerous clearly.

"khushi," an even yet urgent call.

she stopped, eyes widened... dhak dhak dhakdhak... her trouble had started.

she turned around gingerly... he was looking at her, quizzical.

he took his time to walk up to her. heartbeats and music reflected a more and more frantic state of mind.

he stood before her a moment, enjoying her frazzled state.

she couldn't bring herself to look at him.

then he held up a closed fist. intrigue, control, power, possession so many things an image can suggest.

and then once more he acted with a sense of that right, of intimacy...

without a word and never asking her permission, he took the bags from her arm, set them on the floor, with a light smile, moved in, stroked her skin as he caught hold of her wrist... ufff, she was startled, what's he doing, holding hands with her in the hallway? eliza doolittle would have had such a job saying that... bit of eliza in khushi often... today, definitely.

hey hey.. the music entered on cue, things were happening in two hearts and the tremors riffled the air.

but it wasn't what she feared, or maybe hoped for, it was her earring. he was returning it... of course flirting the h out of her in the process.

this is asr. once he is on a project, and a deal has been sighted, he will go all out to win...

i want to win you, i want to defeat you. 

gold gleamed the hair on his forearm as he let the earring fall into her palm. every shot carefully taken, fully assessed for impact and heart thud quotient.

so he found it or took it or what, just to have this little game with her?

two pairs of eyes held each other in a dazed embrace... the dance continued.

a little gentle movement of the head, a playful smile, "kya dekh rahi ho?" he asked, what are you looking at? cool voice, husk in it.

"main janta hoon tum kya soch rahi ho..." i know what you're thinking.

oh no, what does he know about her thoughts... does he know? "hum... s..s..soch..." me... think... she's in no state to answer properly. this alpha male courting with its power control possession thrill thing she has never ever ever been exposed to. it is indeed too much to handle

and he tells her, do not think you've won...

"hum jeet gaye..." she's incoherent. things still not registering, she's drowning... if a little hand holding gets her to this point, strange to think a whole awakening in a farmhouse leaves her so brassy and unmoved.

the talk of win lose seems to give her back her resolve... khushi loves a battle... just like her friend in white shirt.

and so they war over who won and who didn't... felt like foreplay again.

battle time begins. advance, retreat... an animal grace in our man.

"tum jeet gayi par sirf meri vajah se..." you won, but only because of me.

seriously? she has won the pratiyogita, natraj ji is sitting in her home, so who has won? she didn't need him to win... would have won even without him.

ah the confrontation, the fight that excites... friction divine.

"hum khud sambhal lete, samjhe aap?" i would have managed myself, do you understand?

attagirl, give his own lines back to him.

"aap ko kya lagta hai, aapke hone na hone se hume faraq padta hai? aap nahin bhi hote na toh bhi hum jeet jaate. aap hume itna pareshan karte hain ki kabhi kabhi hum devi maiyya se prarthna karte hain ki aap hamari saamne hi na aay..."

and then the classic faraq padta hai moment... you think it makes a difference to me your being or not being there? in fact you bother me so much, sometimes i pray to dm that you don't come in front of me.

there's a hysterical edge to her voice. sanaya takes it to the perfect pitch... something endearing in this girl who is reaching an unknown, never before visited place within her.

she has no idea that love comes with its own power play, especially when things start getting hot. and on dhak dhalks she runs off.

but she does look back at him once, somehow mesmerised by this pareshan making devil. and he's right there looking back, his sure smile says he knows exactly what's happening to her and he's enjoying it...

but he did look a little perturbed when she said she prayed he wouldn't appear before her. involuntarily did a part of him hurt at that? the invincible one has a tender heart, if only someone would see it.

if our hearts fluttered with khushi at this interlude at beginning of episode... at the other end sat love that creeps one out. shyam stood on the gallery and stared beguiled, besotted at khushi ji while planning to kill his wife for the sake of his "love."

second time i noticed that the director chose to portray shyam's perusal of his object of lust through a dreamy camera. close ups that caress, she smiles in slomo, she is ethereal... what a sick fantasy an essentially unethical and amoral creature builds. how easy it is for him to consider murder the moment even the slightest desire of his is thwarted or threatened. asr, though, never sees her through this saccharine haze, he sees her with a direct gaze, bold, straight forward, and he sees her for who she is. as she is. and he likes what he sees. i always enjoyed this detailing by creators.

a scene from the mehendi. akash has just been caught trying to sneak in. a gentle but firm "akash... no way," from anjali. adroitly handled reaction shots from all present, each character true to her/his feelings at the moment. no over acting, camera is light... and an atmosphere of wedding is created.

and once more the bua ji nk connection... payal asks bua ji to put some mehendi for her nand kissore, put an "n" on her palm for him. this cheeky little "romance" between nk and bua is intriguing writing i feel. something funny in it, something cognizant of reality perhaps, our inexplicable secret desires maybe, and something sort of sad here too. it isn't easy to be a lonely middle aged woman with no husband and no children. and be considered too fat and past your prime to be desired. 

t h e  l a g i  s h a r t  e p i s o d e s

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episode rambles

fan fiction

episode 14 good guy bad guy

good guy. "bilkul bhagwan saroop."

bad guy. "burey ke saath bura banna padta hai."

lovely episode. deliciously topsy turvy ipk. scenes segueing seamlessly one to the other. an intensity darkening. what is devi maiyya's wish who knows.

episode 14

he was sweet, he was kind, he protected her from  goons, got her a job, clearly he liked her, at this point there was no way of knowing he wasn't who he said he was. yet. yet, from the first scene onward, something about shyam gave me the creeps. something was not right, it didn't sit. was this the deliberate directorial touches of the flashy bracelet (which i much later realised was inspired by salman khan's bracelet in some movie) and the freaky background music, or was it abhaas interpreting his character with finesse, no idea. maybe both. maybe he made the smile a little too sweet and that didn't feel ok, but in his eyes on that first day they met and she turned back to look at him, there certainly was a genuine emotion. perhaps for a moment he did indeed fall in love, only to realise later it's too late, so he got devising the nonsense he did. interesting character, just wants to get what he wants, in that he is like asr, only his means are always crooked, immoral, shortcut, easy without putting in the necessary effort. unlike asr.

asr was at his nasty best. he was arrogant, peremptory when the phuara, sorry issprinkles, started. what a scathing look at lavanya whom he was actually dating at that point, and how meek she is before his anger, quite unlike someone we know. again great understanding and contrasting of character. he stomped off in rage, threw the ber girl's lunch onto the floor, raved at her, insulted her and implied she was trying to find her way to his home like a sick gold digger, mocked her intentions of returning his money, finally ripped her dupatta and drove off. yet, he just felt clean, real, not a single slimy streak in him, and when he said to her, look don't mess with me today, i really felt sorry for the monster. i could feel his sense of gah what a bad day; his immense effort to create his business and the seething within at seeing such a stupid thing as sprinklers going off completely spoil his bid for a big one. the entire episode was threaded so well, dialogues and references leading seamlessly to scenes. the cruelest bridge was him saying, nothing ever goes wrong at ar, everything happens the way it should to the client, and the alarm going off followed by drenching. of course, while i was gasping for breath at the first bheegi bheegi barun, i did feel really bad for asr.

his dark brooding look at her, there was something in those eyes. a crazy awareness, like he wants to just look some more. his body language around her is getting more defined. she is not like any and everyone else to him. with lavanya he doesn't have that aroused, attracted feel, and that's his girl friend. but around this girl, quirky, weird, bizarrely dressed where he comes from, his antennae are up. 

she too is a different person in his company. it registers in the way she tenses up then proceeds to say whatever comes to her head, and usually ends up not getting the last word. this has started to bother her. she asks her constant companion, almost her alter ego, devi maiyya, what's it with this perennial losing to this fellow.

beginnings of animal attraction, so precious. impossible to describe. you can only feel it. this happens on screen very rarely, where two people have been shot often separately to convey this unspoken thing. takes two actors and a strange thing called chemistry to get it right. so right that you can't think of anything else, even when you see them far apart from each other, cursing and hissing their desire, you keep wondering about them the whole day, and a pair of angry, roiled, flickering eyes never leave you in peace, nor the little signs of tension in the sunniest of faces, a look in her eyes when a stranger rips her dupatta, her protective veil, to almost invade her soul, wondering what's going on.

after that car park scene one needed the spot of delightful comedy provided by pam, sim, chamkili, and the doting sister clinging to bro to just ease off a bit. and seeing him in black, dapper, less angry, gorgeous but not wet helped me regain my heartbeat.

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i couldn't stop making caps or editing. now posting at 2.11am. 

 reminds me so much of a scene by the poolside in 174, just before "lagi shart?" in husky tone.

 

office episodes
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indelibly ipk

sometimes, a rakshas comes and compels you to forget everything and torture yourself by making endless edits. rakshases are great to have around i must say.

 find out more at

episode 13 there once was a bimari

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those holi days

ipk is a classic... no doubt about that really. there are moments there never seen on practically any medium before. unique. pulsating. alive. unforgettable. here i am putting together all my ramblings on one of the finest periods in ipk. holi. 12 to 16 march 2012. episodes 206 to 210. there have been many other such wonder times in iss pyaar ko kya naam doon?. i suddenly saw all that i'd written for holi and missed the time we could run to our television every day and wait to be totally taken over. colour every single day. riot of hues, stunning shades, simmering tones. hope you enjoy the traipse through ramanchi land. all my edits and the five episode takes here. might be too much to read, but enjoy the edits and collages.

and spread the rang... do leave your thoughts behind.

     

12 march, what a morning. waking up or was it
awakening or was it just pure right paagal kaala.
 

"yahan hum dono ke elava aur koi nahin hai... phir aapne kyun...," she asked, she so needed to know. why did you pretend to care, there's no one around. "kyunki tumhara dimaag jo pehle se hi itna kharab hai, usse aur kharab nahin hone de sakte." because you're already damaged in the head, can't let it get any worse. harsh words streaked with vermillion love. to arshad, the real maker of colour. 12 march 2011, holi.

holi had a colour all its own, this is still the 12th of march. how awfully absolutely tender our man, and sweetly confused, just a little hopeful, our jhalli. aisa kyun hota hai.


holi, march 14, almost every scene in this episode is worth a mini heart attack.

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