Friday, 5 February 2016

episode 306 no shayad about it

"koi faraq nahin padta..."
doesn't make a difference (who pays).

"faraq padta hai, humey aapka koi ahsaan nahin chahiye!"
makes a difference, i don't want any favours from you.

his jaw hardens, he loses it again, he'd wanted to ask her why she was so down, behaving mysteriously, lying about her aunt's health. now he whirls her around, for that sentence has cut deep.

"ahsaan!" that voice. "tum meri patni ho, khushi!" favour, he hissed out. maybe "obligation" is a better translation of ahsaan... you are my wife, khushi!

as they wrangled i again felt i was in the middle of something real. not a show.

the big fights in many of our lives happen over things that seem trivial at one level and yet they aren't. there's always some subtext, something being asserted without words.

looked at rationally khushi's walking out on asr after that clifftop and their fervent admission to each other about their feelings, seems silly. but that very love can make us do pretty stupid things at times. even things which are not quite right. he did something just plain wrong on a terrible night, she on a bright clear morning.

he is hellbent on making her part of his life, apologising in his way for his egregious remarks, especially about the contract. and she is determined to leave him because she figures di can's tolerate her and is unhappy seeing her, and that can only make arnav ji sad.. so how can she go on living there. and he's invoked the contract, she had thought that was no longer a part of their story. seems it was... so in thirteen days six months will be over and so will their marriage. but she's leaving him now... very interesting i thought that was.

while this six month marriage idea is very serialish, the tenor and thrum of this fight aren't. when someone is that close to you, there's so much love, there's often strange extreme friction. plenty of that now... and within it a bated thing, a physical thing... sexual attraction.

both are cleaving to each other, he holds her shoulder, she rages at him, he catches and whirls with her, she pulls away like she is coming close, he yanks her to him... they can't keep their hands off each other even if it is to show anger.

but this anger is like that word cleave. it has two sides to it, two meanings, opposites of each other. cleave can mean both to split and to join... reminds me of them and their state of emotion.

in the middle of violence, a man totally confounded as to why his wife is lying and a woman absolutely committed to not letting him know because she must leave him, there's suddenly the sweetest gentleness, when she says she needed to come here for a while, for a badlav... a change... it was zaroori.

a couple of sentences before that she'd said, i don't have to explain things to you... there's no need.. zaroorat for it. he'd yelled pulling her roughly "zaroorat hai, khushi kumari gupta singh raizada!" there is need for an explanation.



felt like a significant word here. it was about that very thing... the need, the zaroorat, for each other. a need that reached beyond all and every limit and barrier.

a beautiful moment when he tried to reach out. you should have tried to tell me once, "ek bar mujhe kahke to dekhti," he says... reminded me of something very similar she'd said on the bridge after he told her he knew of shyam...

but things kept on getting more complicated, they couldn't bridge the distance. a lovely moment as he stood with his hands resting lightly, tenderly on her shoulders.

perhaps the concern from her pati, his sheer insistence on being a part of her life, making her problems his, holding her, everything was becoming hard to handle, the feelings were destroying her resolve, for a little hint sneaked out before she could stop it.

"aap ghar jaiye... terah din mein sab kuch theek ho jaayga..." you go home, in thirteen days all will be fine.

and for some reason, the shatir one did not connect the thirteen days instantly to the contract.

was it fuzzy writing or maybe arnav singh raizada was so confounded by his wife's behaviour, he'd been trying continuously to understand things, he knew something was just not right, but all this tension and to and fro and khushi behaving not at all like herself had worn him down. whatever it was, he did not instantly get she spoke of the contract.

beautiful flow of confusion love wanting... you know you can tell me... humey chalna chahiye... from anger to remorse to sweet gentleness and a sadness spilling over...

"bua ji pareshan ho rahi hogi..." bua ji must be getting concerned, she said in a flat voice. then the step back, out of his arms. so so poignant. a quiet, sad khushi.

... acting writing direction all on cue.

and for the first time ever he seemed totally lost.
"hain, nand kissore... sab theek toh hai?" is everything all right called out bua ji on seeing the two of them.



that despondent reply... one of the saddest things i've heard.

the arrogant, cocky, sharp tycoon, who took charge of things, who knew exactly what he'll do, especially when things got rough, wore a note of defeat.. almost... today.

he'd tried so hard, but he hadn't been able to reach khushi. he had no idea what was really going on.

shayad... maybe... no that is so not this man. i felt terrible for him.

that "nothing" moment


he left bua ji's place looking lost, but then as khushi went to close the door, he stepped smoothly back in surprising her... tell me khushi, what's the matter, he asked, i'm with you. oh h sweetness of the most divine kind. she looked like she would just cave in and leap into his arms, instead she did a classic woman thing... "kuchh nai" nothing is the matter replied she in a small voice, eyes desperate. oh when a girl says "nothing" in that girl way. he knew things were really really bad. beautiful note to the scene, writing and direction and acting again lovely.

soon though he realised exactly what she had meant by thirteen days and resolved to change her mind.

his way.

but before that a simple absorbing sequence, as he stood quietly in his room followed by a fluid almost dance like pacing in his room thinking and feeling things... that old habit. a gentle deliberateness... he is strategising... planning... and the room felt particularly lonesome tonight reflecting the yearning of its owner maybe.


there was something intensely expressive about the way he walked in and let the thoughts come. i noticed a lot happened at doorways in this episode, a familiar ipk thing, some sort of significance there no doubt... 

he heard in his mind three separate conversations...

"tum meri shart manogi

mujhse shadi karogi


chhai mahine ke liye"

you will accept my conditions
you'll marry me
for six months

"hume jaane dijiye..."

let me go.

"tum nahin ja sakti...

apna contract todkar kaise ja sakti ho."

you can't go, how can you break your contract and leave...

"aap ghar jaiye..."

 go home... in thirteen days everything will be fine

it was like a little story within the larger plot.

he recalled his harshest moments with her, and her most helpless ones... he hadn't given her a choice both times, and perhaps for the same reason, because he couldn't let her go. 

"isiliye woh ghar chhorke gayi hai... kyunki shadi ka contract..." that's why she's left home he thought aloud, because of the contract... 

nostrils flared, jawline went rigid, but there was that need in the eyes... the director went for understatement.

a miserable khushi counts the hours...only twelve more days...

"ek aur din beet gaya... ab bas bara din aur, usske baad hum arnav ji ke patni nahin rahenge..." one more day is gone, now just twelve left, after that i won't be arnav ji's wife, she moaned. 

cut to a man gearing up for the next course of action... the "shayad" completely gone from his demeanour.

"bas bara din... mere paas bara din hai tumhare dil phirse jeet ne ke liye!" just twelve days, he thought, i have twelve days to win your heart. the deal maker wants to win... but just her love, her heart... 

having cracked the code, he is now getting into the plan to destroy all opposition and get his wife back. i liked the fact that he did the whole thing as asr would, not just any sweet lover boy.

there is claw and cleave and win and lose in this thing. he is entering the game. he is enjoying it. 

"tumhe lagta hai ki tum bahut smart ho.. lekin.. shayad tum bhool gayi ki main arnav singh raizada hoon..."

 you think you're very smart... but... perhaps you're forgetting i am asr.

i want to give loud whistles at this whistle deserving salim javed style dialogue. could have been corny as h but again barun makes it cool, cute, exciting all at once.

"aur iss baar sab kuch mere tarike se hoga..." and this everything will happen the way i want it to.

his music played, gentler though... a man in love...

khushi dreamt of him again. again it was money talk. the girl has a problem with money, some sort of insecurity maybe... in a funny kind of way, it was money that brought them together... her promise to slam before him 25k for the repair of his suv side mirror.

"hum aapke ek ek pai chuka denge..." i will return every cent of yours, said she to the smiling demon before her as she clutched the burden of cash, her debt, on her head. 

"egggzacktly aisa hi pahle bhi kissine kaha tha, khushi kumari gupta... singh raizada..." someone had said exactly that once before, quipped mills and boon hero rakshas.

maybe she can sense him already... she can guess what he is about to do... 

of course, next morning when i saw asr in his office, i knew the man was not only out to win, he was out to kill (primarily me). arnav singh raizada had decided he will ruin khushi's neat plan with immense pressure re house, rent, bua ji's home, etc. he had also decided he'd completely nullify her resistance with his sheer good looks. everything needed to cut the deal, disarm the opponent.

don't tell me he had no idea of how good he was looking in that black grey combination, also that slightly loose tie.
she wore red, he black... she was angry, he cool... all asr, and the loving got going with some good old raving and ranting.

at one point he said "aaw" head tilted back, eyes hooded... i had to copy that forever.

she's never coming back to ask for madat, help.. she gritted out.

"kuch bhi karlo, khushi," you'll have to come back that too before the contract ends, he thought to himself with a satisfied air.

the contract became as though a game between them... i liked that. the thing that was the most tricky part in their relationship, a ridiculous contract of a six month marriage which only happens in tv land, the writers decided to use as a means of cementing their tie further, something smart in that.

the episode had a beginning full of confusion and attraction, a stunning one word middle... shayad... and then an end full of heat, bait and attraction. was a breathtaking watch.

bolo... i'm listening.

er breathing suddenly difficult.


couple of thoughts/irrelevant asides:

~ so babu ji was getting better. then what happened?

~ mami ji said, "no hello hi turant bye bye detectibhgiri kareka padi, manorama..."  he hello hi, quickly bye bye, must do some dective-ing.

~ me as perplexed as mami ji about anjali. why is she talking to herself... maybe her bluetooth is on? really that setting up of anjali surreptitiously talking to shyam was done ineptly.

~ "bed side humri..." mami ji said this side of the bed is hers... remember pala?

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