episode 67 a survivor's guide

a survivor's guide to how to handle people you hate.

or an analysis of episode 67

1. make sure, no matter what, you crash land into their lives at least once a day. a meeting a day will make the hatred, also known as nafrat, stay. you can choose to do this anywhere you wish. ramps have proven to be extremely useful, especially if tripping gorgeously is a major part of plan. you can find them on the streets, in their office, at sundry sacred trees, dargahs, mandirs, best of all, of course, at their home. oh nothing quite like that. home is where the hate is.

2. dream of them on a regular basis. in such dreams, it is best to see yourself in the role of hero, them as villain. for example, you are the white wigged, morally superior judge to their "darana dhamkana," rakshas who is forcing a helpless woman in skimpy clothes and come hither look to "l-l-live in" with him "bina shadi," and do "sab kuch" with him too.

terrible (where are the samosas). tell him there's no way he can have what he wants. "you are sentenced to living with lavanya (everyone holds their breath, will you force the rakshas to do the right thing and marry this poor maid?)... not."  yes, that's right, throw lavanya out of his life. this will lead to exactly what you want in the future and right now too. the rakshas looking monstrously good in his natty brown jacket, will peruse you ferociously from a low angle shot, say "oh, i can't darao her?!! but i can still scare you, can't i" and glide sublimely to his very own music to be right in front of you, breath touching distance, in just a few long strides. 

having accomplished your mission, you will fall backward eyes spewing nafrat, lips parting and quivering (it's an age old sign of hatred, especially when combined with heaving bosom). he will stare at you menacingly, eyes gone chocolate. justice will not be able to take such "tauheen," contempt of court.

she will discard her blindfold and appear to you as your favourite bua, rolling pin in hand (justice was despatched by you to make samosa, perhaps?). at this point if it all starts to remind you of the white rabbit, the queen of hearts, eliza dolittle, and the horrible henry higgins, fikar not. all is going fantastically. your nafrat is intact. rabba vey, you are so good at this.

3. every time anyone asks you to leave the city your adversary lives in, refuse to. insist that is what your dm recommends. conversely, every time your enemy says she'll leave town, go into a blue funk and get as many flashbacks of her as possible. nothing like a keen memory to sharpen the daggers.

4. following from 3 (which was a bit of a digression into other episodes but was necessary to create a complete guide), also refuse to be not insulted by him. sounds complicated, but it's simple really. this is what you do: even if someone is willing to pay you large sums of money to square up your debt, insist that the only way you will do this is by earning the amount. and that too, only by working in the very home of the person who doesn't farak you, who is always rude, nasty, as insulting as possible, and who makes you feel "main theek nahin hoon," every time you are mean to him. of course, make sure that you throw in a "shart," a strict one that says you will come to work only when he's not around. this works real well, he will hear of it and another level of how dare she hotness will be scaled. 

5. keep your ears clean. whenever anyone mentions, whispers, or even thinks of taking her name, hear it loud and clear. then go still. don't breathe. now, two options:
  

  5. a. glare at the one who has called your nafrat-ed one by a derogatory name such as chamkili, you may also narrow your eyes devilishly upon being told of her fiendish plans. how dare she put down such a condition... not to see you in your own house? it's MERA ghar... MY house, remember? the one from which you are determined to throw her out (i mean how to trust a guest who keeps climbing into you closet and other internal organs, who can blame you for shouting your most lusty "getooouuut," at her... if only your eyes would agree with your voice, sigh).

after eye narrowing, sashay sexily out into the hallway, and on finding her there as she is trying to look nonchalant eating chana, advance menacingly but with ballet like grace toward her, she will be compelled to walk in your direction, eyes only on you. as you cross each other she will mutter nuttily "bina shadi saath saath rakshas," (without marriage together together monster... to translate literally), giving you the perfect opportunity to do a mind blowing (see, everything is to your advantage) "what the."

then she will dash into a pillar, and you will not miss any opportunity to stare at her. for good measure, this will happen twice... this is serious nafrat, samjhi tum?

5.b when option "a" is not available, you must slip into flashback of woh ladki and plenty rabba vey. this episode however that was not necessary. the dream compensated most adequately, phew.

6. always remember to blame the other, only that one person... laad governor, rakshas, uss ladki, uss khushi kumari gupta, any other new names you might come up with... for all the "galati" in the world. one episode you say it, the next episode let your most important hated person do the needful.

1722. as a master strategy, take over his home. rush around teaching his girl friend how to be the girl he doesn't dream of; make her learn to do the things he doesn't like or care for. leap around the drawing room telling a most fascinating tale of a rather playful one, in the most charming and beguiling vein, leaving all who watch, like his nani, his sis, his favourite man servant, floored. to help you in this endeavour, his clueless l-l-live in poor girl friend in chhotey kapde is standing by.

at her wonderful cues, prance into action, point with grace and utter appeal toward the one you must hate, and call him by the name of another supreme villain, "kans." make sure you are looking like the cutest and most beautiful nut on earth while doing this, some extra ballet (or taekwondo) lessons might help strike the perfect pose. this will work. can't you tell be the way he's looking at you?

8. as reminded by chalhov. and because we are dead serious about this survival guide, we don't wish to hold back anything. so here goes: when sitting next to the baddie in his mythical suv (if horses and dragons can by part of myths, why not the white suv), remember never to put on seat belt. although you have driven your dad's car, and will later decimate all traffic rules hurtling frantically through sabzi mandis and things, but at this point, do make it a point not to wear that s thing. this will make sure the hate increases. the enemy can bark "seat belt peheno!" wear seat belt!! in various shades of boorishness. and at your fumbling, lose patience, reach across brusquely, thrust his face closer to yours, his torso mere millimetres away from yours, combat you in an eye lock while clicking the belt into its slot. even writing this can cause breathing failure, so please, whatever you do, don't miss a chance to inhale and exhale, you will feel the edge of your ear go hot, a certain prickle back of neck, definite change in heart rate, and a difficulty understanding which part of you is feeling what. do not worry.

 it is believed that the perpetrator of the seat belt nafrat is undergoing similar symptoms. you will both survive, just about. however, at every opportunity that presents itself try out the seat belt tactic. practice makes perfect. (this was first observed in episode 65, at the very height of nafrating, and although this episode did not present the opportunity, we felt it was important enough to be included here. you never know...)

STICKY (this applies to all episodes, everywhere in the universe, even the ones hunted out of yt and dm): beware, from time to time you may hear things. strange are the effects of nafrat. piano trilling do me so do... hey hey... heyheyhey... more music, then rabba vey... ey ey ey ey. do not panic. in extreme cases of nafrat this may happen. though in recorded history it's never been known to have happened. oh well, there's always a first time... just take basic precautions, you'll be fine. remember, no matter what happens, do not close your eyes, or look away from the opponent's gaze. also, do not move. and should the adversary want to pull you in closer or nuzzle your hair, or frankly whatever, go ahead and let him do it. this is absolutely imperative for survival. live demo of this threat unfortunately not available, but the illustrations will suffice we hope.

to be continued. we hope you found this guide helpful.

a fabulous chance to learn more skills hands on awaits. it's the musician's birthday party, they say he has some wonderful hate tricks that no one can help but fall for. see you at the bash, wish you all a bina shadi saath saath sab kuch kar sakte hain  and an ek saath do do time.

translatiya: wish you all a "without marriage together can do everything" and "1722 or what sounds like together two two" time.

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episode 289 trial by liar

"chase after the truth like all hell and you'll free yourself, even though you never touch its coat tails."
~~~ clarence darrow ~~~


"... ooka kidnap hui gawa..."

with this dramatic declaration by mami ji started the episode that would go into the revelation of kidnap and in fact, intent to murder, before the raizada family.

i watched the episode quite fascinated i have to say. i knew what had bothered me by the end of the three episode sequence where asr never spoke. but on the first day, the structure seemed interesting.

looking at the placing of people in the frame... the movements of various persons or their staying in fixed positions, the parallel with chess has come up again and again.

i don't much understand the game, though i have played it a couple of times. but the sense of game... a game where moves will matter like hell, and the board can turn swiftly and disconcertingly did come through.

what it all most reminded me of was the hindi movie court room drama, if i may guffaw and add, wigs and blind lady justice included. only that the lady was more blind than just and all too human in the end. 

khushi and shyam were like the two lawyers holding their brief, she the prosecutor, he the defence guy. they were fighting their own case. anjali was the one they both homed in on to convince of the details of the case. in a way, she was the judge.

the others were the spectators and jury both, and though we don't have the jury system in our courts... there was that element here. their opinion counted.

two witnesses really...

the first was the prosecution witness who turned... my sweet manorama. at last i understood why they made khushi come up with the goofy plan of asking shyam to divorce anjali. mami, already feeling distanced and shut out, would see this game through her binoculars, somehow through those she never sees the truth, does she. and she will stop trusting khsuhi entirely.

the second was the witness named after the ultimate game player... nand kishore, nk... in his clean guileless "sakha" form. he will remain true.

and there was asr, a bit away from it all, even maybe a bit above. the silent one who watched the proceedings, who perhaps doesn't want to be perceived as taking sides, knowing the two most important people in his life are involved and this denouement could be catastrophic for both or one of them.

what intrigued me about how it was all told:

the girl who had convinced the skeptic that the issue is not about rational truth or falsehood, it's a matter of vishwas or faith... life brought her to a point where she she had to grapple with truth... sach. she had to prove it. everything in fact depended on it. 
 
perhaps khushi has come to the end of her tether. i think everything went haywire in her when she realised the plan was to kill asr. kidnap she could maybe still deal with, but the death of arnav ji? if i see it from that angle, i can understand her needing to bring all of it out finally. and sanaya looked tired, almost hysterical, hellbent on getting the culprit exposed. something natural in that.

she confirmed it was a kidnap, she said it wasn't for ransom, she revealed the terrible plan... they meant to kill arnav ji. during the course of the episode she also explained, the whole thing was about property.

suddenly, khushi who had kept so many things hidden, seemed absolutely desperate to have everything out in the open. can't blame her. two crazy weeks and actually watching someone contemplate burning your husband down can take anyone to the edge where you break free of social norms and checks and say, enough!

as many questions flew around and asr realised his sister needed to be calmed down, the basic design of the "trial" got going. khushi spoke... mami created little hurdles while shyam played the slimy lawyer to the hilt, rendering all evidence inadmissible on some pretext or the other.

today, asr might have let things be, but not khushi...
 
"haan, di, yeh sach hai," yes, di, this is true, with that khushi brought up sach/truth for the first time that day.
shyam was the one to say jhoot/lie and saboot/proof first.she knew whom the truth would effect the most, so on halting yet determined steps she moved straight to anjali and held her hand, and she said,
di, hum jaantey hain ki hamrai sach kahne se aapko bahut dukh hoga
bahut taqleef bhi hogi
lekin ab humse aur bardasht nahin hota
humey aapko sach batana hi hoga
aur...
aur ss...ssach yeh hai ke...

her tongue trembled on the sach... it was so difficult to actually reveal the  truth.

mami butted in. don't start another ramayan, phatti saree. ramayan, hmmm... i had to think, so the silent one is playing a ram perhpas? holding aloof and letting sita go through her agni pariksha alone? not good. not asr.

khushi still refused to let go. today her eye is trained on the target with that singular focus of arjuna. now that i think... in the last two episodes, again and again she has collapsed and said she can't do this thing any more, ghin ati hai... and nk has counselled her... told her she is doing it all for her husband. this is her duty. reminds one of the first chapters of gita... krishna telling the bereft arjuna, lift your gandiva. do your duty. no matter how hard and harsh it may seem.

there are actually parts of gita i find hard to digest, and then there are these absolutely beautiful and stunning things.

among my favourites of course, yada yada hi dhramasya... whenever evil comes and tries to overrun the world, i will come myself to vanquish wrong... sambhavami yuge yuge. nah, it is not by chance that nk is called that, nor that he is chosen as khushi's counsel. and the way he appears suddenly out of the blue, just as the evil strikes at the righteous with one more slaying of her evidence... nice.
"woh insaan yahin hai," that person is here, khushi avered.

"iss kamre mein..." in this room.

"sabke saamne..." in front of everyone.

all along shyam had tried in very slimy lawyer vein to stay out of the way of any litigation. he just watched to see which way it all went. he looked shocked when mami said she knew. i wondered why... mami and khushi had gone to rocky's place together and later to the godown. anyway, khushi was relentless and in a rather hindi movieishly written way, she finally turned and faced him and said...

"hai na, shyam ji?"

isn't that so, shyam ji?

of course, shyam realised there was no escape now, he had to defend himself and so rushed over to his raanisahiba.

"aaj sabke saamne hum aapka parda phash karenge," today in front of everyone i'll expose you said khushi, assertive and determined. arjuna, who has gotten up and is now ready for battle.

while shyam, the duryodhan of this story, laid his chakravyuh by sowing doubt, ridiculing, challenging every word and asking for material evidence, then throwing that away as invalid. he even alleged the warrior had transgressed her limits by entering his and his raanisahiba's private chambers. all along he clung to his wife and tried to gauge the mood, swing it in his favour. the jury was so important here.

or so ha ha he thought.

di freaked. asr watched. shyam took advantage of anything he could.

anjali said to khushi what she had said to mami, "aapko koi bhram hua hoga..." you are imagining things. her illusion would not be shattered.

and the baat sach ya jhoot girl became desperate to prove sach...

"jhoot hai yeh, bakwas hai bilkul..." countered shyam, and asked for proof.

i am glad in all this, khushi said plainly, she had made asr sign the papers.

of course, her phone was gone with all the pictures of the will and the voice recording; and the blood on shyam's shoes could have belonged to anyone.

in the middle of all this came nk. and after a mysterious serial type pause, he readily said, khushi was speaking the truth.

his spontaneous hug to nannav and the you did it! to khushi were sweet and infectious. something pristine about this character. hard to imagine he belongs to a serial. though they did make him pause and say nothing for no reason today.

the courtroom drama would have been interesting if they had found a way to let asr beat shyam to a pulp the moment he started saying filthy things about khushi. but i think again and again, the creatives fell in love with form over content. and what seemed very clever started becoming rather empty and lost connection with the viewer.

and...

~ would have been nice if someone offered the man who came home after g knows how long, in a vest with cuts, bruises and filth all over, a glass of water, the use of the loo, a little rest and food, before starting off the commotion.

~ shyam had a cut on the cheek just like asr? whom should i get assassinated for this, c'mons tells me.

~  just about where they stand now and have this trial, and khushi's character is challenged, in episode 67 khushi had had a loopy dream/nightmare about her chief culprit asr. she was the judge. it was a lovely light piece. but there too the defendant had been aggressive and threatened her... she had quaked but held on. we are going to see another rendition of that here. only now it's a real life nightmare. 

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