from crooner breathless

who could be expected to write cogently today after seeing what we have seen.

i am all over the place. a voice is blowing through me. a trembling lip caresses my eyes. what's that rush of wind and that distant song that plays? long distance, extreme close up, utterly scraggly and worn out "i love you."

is there any other way to say those words.

again and again and again barun shows his mettle as an actor. does even he know how good he is?

method acting from a lad who was minding phone calls till just a couple of years ago. who said the book he'd perused as a youngster was mainly his dad's cheque book. a 28 year old whose interviews never go right, right but not "right right". a serial actor who is handed the script piece meal, day upon day with no real plan as to where it's all headed. no ready film script here, no complete, edited, perfected play. a daily soap.

bless you, barun sobti.

and yes, sanaya irani. for close to 10 days now you've carried this show. she is a spunky one, isn't she? she knows who everyone is really devoted to, that the main audience of a daily tv romance isn't made up of men waiting to fall in love with love. yet, she's never phased. in fact. she gives her work and her co-star her utter best, straight from the heart, from the purest place of instinct and she shines. inviting all around her to shine as well. marvelous.

gosh that silent entreaty through inanimate phones and airwaves. one hand presses the receiver close to the ear, "khushi!" and an expression flits, a tear forms, the other hand comes up and cradles the phone closer. the tear rolls (the order of events is a mental recall, may be a bit off. sorry). she never says a word, yet she's saying so much to him. and he can hear every word.

god who wrote this scene. who directed it. who set the music. who edited. who counted the seconds. who said let the wind blow.

may i fall at your feet.

anjali returned in full force today. the milk crashed to the floor, and it was as though she reached right in and found the di that is viscerally attached to her chotte. children of the same mother.

yeah, looks like a kidnap (i never saw the precap as i caught the second telecast) and looks like snakewa is the creep. alas even all that lifebuoy couldn't wash the filth off him. oh oh oh. out, damned spot, out!

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wrote this on crooner soon after watching the episode. one of my earliest posts on the forum. i still recall my state when i first saw this scene. there was a lot of hope about the story and characters at that point... things didn't go the way we thought they might. but the feelings about the performance remain just that, in fact, every day i get hit by it some more.

 

those words... woh baat

he was a young man with a hope in his heart one night not so long ago... till darkness took it away. he believed what he saw was true... and let his hope go with the light in his eyes dimming. but perhaps it lingered, a little disobedient, buried deep in a place with almost no light. his chot wrapped in the blood and throb of his heart. till today. till now. when at last he came to believe, not what he saw, but what he felt was true. the rest was merely that... the rest.

as the wind rose in a gust and wrapped around him and a girl at the other end of a phonecall, he said the words he had so wanted to say that night... the treasure held deep in him. ... khushi, i love you.

his love rose in triumph and broke the barrier set by dimaag and rushed with the song of his dil... he let it flow out and surge over to her. perhaps that's why instantly a single tear, flowed out like a river from her eye... coursing down, racing toward her ocean.

khushi main...

khushi main woh...

khushi, i love you.

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episode 141 two conversations

"don't you ever ever do this to me again... samjhi tum?"

he is shouting into the phone, beside himself with worry. tense, fearing the worst... mind flying to terrible places as his repeated calls to her are going unanswered. would i panic like that for someone fairly incidental in my life... an essentially faraq nahin padta sort of entity? would i say, don't you ever do that... to me? he is shatir of mind but obviously the shenanigans of his dil are beyond comprehension now.

there are only feelings running wild.

two conversations, one at top of episode and the other as episode came to and end, were where it was all at for me. both conversations were had with khushi. in the first one, he succeeded in quickly hiding his feelings, and she was too perturbed, distracted to perhaps notice the glaring gaffes.

in the second one, he couldn't help himself; his feelings, his lowering of guard, his showing of faraq, everything was there... only for khushi. unfortunately he was saying it all to lavanya.

he is really like that only, to steal from the famous "v are like that only," tagline for v tv.

every word of the first conversation was classic. this is exactly how your long time lover or husband sounds when you don't pick up the phone for a day... she'd been gone longer in his estimate... an entire couple of hours. the feeling was so new, its intensity stratospheric, its proneness to jump to the worst conclusion worryingly high. today he thought she had been hurt or worse... soon this will make him think the worst of her.

"khushi, phone kyun nahin utha rahi hai..." why isn't she picking up the phone he muttered as he kept on trying. and when she did pick up the phone, that relief swamped him... he just lost it. all his emotions there in the words that exploded.

"pata hai kabse phone mila raha hoon main... tumne phone kyun nahin uthaya?" do you know for how long i've been trying, why didn't you pick up the phone?!!

she's taken aback at his vehemence.

"kitna pareshan ho gaya tha main," i was so worried, his voice is raw, real... he wanted to see, her hug her perhaps, make sure she was ok. yet her voice was all he could hold on to and she didn't say a word. that halted him.

"khushi... khushi talk to me..." silence at the other end, then his three little words, "tum theek ho? kahan ho tum?" where are you?

"hum bilkul theek hain. hum mandir mein hain," she said as calmly as she could, i am ok, i'm at the temple. her world was reeling and this extreme emotion at this point was perhaps too much to handle. she was begging dm to show her the way. weighing competing stories that affected all their lives, wondering how to work it all up to the point where she could reveal shyam's true face without harming anything or anyone.

how does an 18/19 year old cope with this? or does precisely this youth and its resilience itself work i ones favour ultimately?

he hears her voice and seems to breathe again.

"aapko fikar karne ki..." you don't have to worry, she starts but he has to cut her short. "fikar" a sense of care in it... and he can't let her think it was that.

"fikar ki baat nahin hai... mera matlab... itna sara kaam baki hai..." it's not about that... i mean there's so much work to be done... lame excuse, man yelling on the phone.

she puts the phone down after saying i had to go... there's so much going through him as he stands there trying to cool down, work off the worry. camera pulls back slowly, la stands in foreground... privy to a conversation and its effect she wished she'd never witnessed.

the entire middle of the episode was bloated with shyam. and begging for some right emotion from the mother and aunt of a girl they called their own. shyam used his usual ploys to try and get khushi to keep quiet. he hoped his "confession" would make them realise what a decent soul he was, he cleverly inserted worries about payal and akash's relationship, especially in light of the fact that payal's baraat had gone back before. love the way he goes for a volley of arrows, hoping something will catch someone... the faces were looking too determined and scathing... surely, someone? and an arrow found its mark. amma. and her fear of payal's shaadi breaking again. satisfied with his handiwork, shyam did some serious lopsided smiling and went off, off course a couple of twitches were added too for good measure.

notice how both hero and villain have lopsided smiles. one has us clutching our gut/heart, the other has us quaking/guffawing. naughty director was having a lot of fun at the expense of the ladkiyan... us.

thereafter, the tussle over the yes or no of divulging all to anjali. i missed asr for khushi at this point. haq hai tumhara... mujh pe. you have a right over me. possibly the only human being to give her that unstintingly and one who'd defend her rights no matter what. instead of begging titaliya's forgiveness for coercing and forcing her to say yes to shyam, buaji is all righteous rage and advice. and amma? the writers did her grave injustice at this point, or was there a peak into reality in her reaction?

payal is her husband's biological daughter, khushi is her sister's only child, when push came to shove, she seemed to take the side of the one born to her husband... was there a touch of looking after number one by her instincts? perhaps being middle class, the horror of yet another broken marriage for her daughter was too much to bear, she didn't even feel her other daughter's turmoil, her state of mind. she felt no rage against shyam for doing this to her child... just that fear of shame in payal's life stalked her.

no one thought of khushi's feelings.

finally, payal stepped in and said, no way, jose... shyam hangs. a clear headed, straight forward sort of girl, with a quiet courage, a fierce love for her sister who came, lost and little, into her life years ago. a girl of a certain stubbornness too... she could have gone far.

as i was thinking this, they cut to this scene. too shatir director/screenplay writer... one ladki stopped thinking immediately.

he sits at his recliner working, remembers her dashing into him at the poolside...  tears, helpless, silent... a slow close up... a world of feelings in  his inward gaze. she is on his mind, constantly.

as his fiance watches, he picks up his phone with a distracted air and fixes a meeting for the sixteenth, the day he is to get engaged. she is shocked. she tries to nudge his memory... fails. then he gets it.

the ultimate, "oh shucks" expression as he turns away... soon there's a layer of remorse.

"tell me the truth asr, kya tum sach mein bhoole the... ya fir tumhe koi faraq hi nahin padta..." la can't just let this pass, she keeps seeing things and the warning signs are too many to ignore. she decides to check out the scene... tell me, asr, did you really forget or does it not matter to you anyway.

"nahin... it's..." he's not himself at all... feeling strange... this engagement that he called upon himself... "it's not that... i'm really sorry... woh itti saari cheese handle karta hoon kabhi kabhi kuch pata hi nahin chalta..." no really, it's not that, i'm really sorry, i keep doing so many things, sometimes i just don't know what i do...

"itti saari..." was this just by chance or deliberate? the only other time i have heard asr use the more colloquial way of saying itna or itni was during that terrible and beautiful fight of first august. "itta aasan hai tumhare liye?" usually he'd say "itna" or "itni." maybe this was just barun slipping into easier pronouciation, but worked like a dream... a telltale slip indicating his heightened emotional state, the so rigid and precise world of asr not that much in control?

he knows this is all wrong. he walks away and with his back to her, his classic stance, he starts an apology that will lead to the realisation of a truth by lavanya... though still a tad unclear to him (slow boy, in matters of dil).

"main janta hoon ki jaane anjane mein maine tumhe bahut chot pahunchai hai..." his mind was so on khushi, not yet disengaged from her... i know, knowingly and otherwise i've hurt you a lot.

la looks up, surprised.

"woh iss liye... but that's because... iss liye kyunki mujhe kabhi pata hi nahin chalta... it's because i never really know... par phir jab realise karta hoon... but then when i realise it... i really regret it.. i ... i really do..."
 
la is smiling, beginning to walk toward him...

"bahut bura lagta mujhe... par main kuch kabhi jaankar nahin karta, khushi, main bas..." i feel really bad... but i never do anything knowing what i'm doing, khushi, i'm just...

khushi. la hears the name and seems to freeze. he still has no idea what he's just said... he carries on, la can't stop him.

"main bas aisa hi hoon, shayad main..." i am like this, maybe i...

la has to make him stop. for her sake. for his sake. she puts her hand on his shoulder.

"asr, it's lavanya." that's all... that's enough. more effective than a moral lecture, a diatribe.

he turns around... shocked at himself... at the whole thing.this is one of those unbelievably beautiful scenes of ipk which makes it a classic. a man in love, completely unaware that that's what it is, is making a confession of his shortcomings to the woman he loves, little realising it is not her but his fiance standing there listening. when he is in such deep emotion there seems to be only one person he reaches out to, whether she is there... or not.

sublime insight into a state of mind. and of course, barun sobti's acting leaves you shaken to the core. this is a real man talking here... a soliloquy so beautiful, it would get etched in our minds... "main bas aisa hi hoon," words that would become quotable in no time.

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hello love : a vm

~~~ watch hello love here ~~~

258 took us straight to the phone call. i am tempted to capitalise the "the" here. what a beautiful and utterly sexy way to tell the one you adore that you actually, er... um... don't cry, please mat roh... you actually love her.

she of course, instantly cried and lovely tears flowed and floored. he almost choked up too. and he still looked all asr. tender, worried, filling with the need to love, eyes deeply emotional, perhaps a little lost even, but stance a hundred and one asr.

this was their phone call. no one could speak beautifully of love like that over ordinary phone lines... nor of irritation, anger, frustration, hate... those phone calls of theirs... what was really happening in them? the visuals swam before my eyes, coming together, coalescing, breaking up, spreading again joining up... a whole string of them like those pearls... what strung it all together?

a long, languorous vm tries to find out. it is 7 minutes and 40 seconds long, so if you have something on the stove or a deadline waiting, or he's waiting to find out "haan ya na," maybe you shouldn't see it right now... but at some point, please do see. i loved making it... you might like it too. the sensuous and powerful voice of atif aslam in the background.

kate, thanks for your help with the episodes.

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my very poor translation.


asr: khushi kumari gupta, i'm not letting you breathe in peace so easily.

asr: don't you ever, ever do this to me again, d'you understand? do you know for how long i have been trying to call you! why didn't you pick up the phone, i was so worried!

khushi: must be amma, babuji! hello! i was waiting for your call! you haven't slept as yet?
asr: what?!!

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asr: khushi... khushi, talk to me! are you alright? where are you!

asr: if you're done with talking rubbish, then listen carefully!

khushi: i am absolutely ok... i am at the temple. you don't have to be concerned...

asr: it's not about concern!

khushi: arnav singh raizada!

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asr: what the!! why is khushi's phone busy!

asr: i mean... there's so much work to be done, how can you leave like this suddenly!

announcer: the dialed number is busy now.

khushi: who knows who the lord governor is talking to now... and that too just when i need to talk to him!

asr hears her line is busy: she must be talking to her fiance! (note gritted teeth)

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asr disconnects his phone. a call where nothing is said...

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asr: khushi, i love you.

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khushi: first you put it down... then i'll again say, "no, first you put the phone down..." then you'll again say, "no, first you put the phone down..." are you from lucknow or not?!!  and why are you quiet now!

(refers to an old joke about the highly courteous folk of lucknow who carry on with elaborate courtesies such as letting the other person get the first chance... so, you first... no, you first ... carries on while trains planes buses spaceships are missed.)

asr pretends to be akash.

khushi embarrassed: jeeja ji... that...

asr laughs meanly.

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asr: i keep track of all that's going on with you.

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asr: she must be sleeping... in some taekwondo pose.

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the song: kuch iss tarah by atif aslam

kuch iss tarah, teri palkein meri palkon se mila de
a bit like this, let your lashes meet mine

aansoo tere saare meri palkon pe saja de
arrange all your tears on my lashes

kuch iss tarah, teri palkein meri palkon se mila de
a bit like this, let your lashes meet mine

aansoo tere saare meri palkon pe saja de
arrange all your tears on my lashes

tu har ghadi, har waqt mere saath raha hai
every hour, all the time, you've been with me

haan yeh jism kabhi door klabhi paas raha hai
yes this body has been at times far at times near

jo bhi gham hain ye tere unhen tu mera pata de
whatever are your sorrows give them my address

kuch iss tarah, teri palkein meri palkon se mila de
a bit like this, let your lashes meet mine

aansoo tere saare meri palkon pe saja de

arrange all your tears on my lashes

mujhko to tere chehre pe ye gham nahin jachta
on your face this sadness doesn't appeal to me

jayiz nahin lagta mujhe gham se tera vasta
doesn't seem right a relationship between you and sorrow (sadness)

sun meri guzarish, isse chehre se hata de
listen to my plea, remove it from your countenance

kuch iss tarah, teri palkein meri palkon se mila de
a bit like this, let your lashes meet mine

aansoo tere saare meri palkon pe saja de
arrange all your tears on my lashes


naturally, no copyright infringement is intended. this is a fan appreciation video and there's no commercial transaction involved. thanks to all at ipkknd and atif aslam, the original owners of the material.





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episode 258 to love

a long time ago, when he was still involved with another girl, in fact engaged to her, he had forgotten everything and remembered only her. khushi. for she had looked troubled, distracted, fragile and brittle. like the pieces of the mug that had broken when she'd dashed against him by the poolside in her rush to get away from something terrible.

he had been angry, but then that was usual. then he had seen her eyes and everything had turned in a chaotic pulse beat to driving urgent concern, worry. what was the matter with khushi? why was she in this state? had anyone hurt her... then horror dawning... had her... had her... and no matter how much it hurt to say it he had asked if her fiance, her mangetar had done anything... did he do anything to hurt you? the flare of protective anger in his being, his eyes, the instinct to guard her, to not spare anyone who had hurt her.

she had almost said yes, almost told him what her fiance had done, but then she had fled.

leaving him worried, disoriented, unable to focus on anything. not his girlfriend even; he was unable to hide his feelings... he had openly shown his concern, his sister had noticed... so had his girl friend.

he had called her again and again that day. and finally when she'd picked up the phone, he had raged, "don't you ever, ever do this to me again... samjhi tum!!" the first time perhaps clearly saying... she mattered.

to him.

of course the layers of anger and his long nurtured defence, his fortress of indifference, and khushi's complete mental disarray at that moment had come in the way of a real delving into that unguarded statement of his.

"pata hai kabse phone baja raha hoon main... tumne phone nahin kyun uthaya...kitne pareshan ho gaya tha main" do you know for how long i have been trying to call you... why didn't you pick up the phone... i was so worried, he had yelled... then he had somehow controlled his ire and let his concern, his need to hear that she was ok come to the fore...

"khushi...khushi... talk to me..."

she had been dumbstruck... still fragile.

"tum theek ho?" he had asked his classic question to her, perhaps itself a semaphore signal, a telegraphic code of his vast emotion, his deep feelings for her. three little words.

"kahan ho tum!" he wanted to know where she was, what was the matter, was she alright... this is a man supposedly to whom she means nothing, koi matlab nahin, he had left no opportunity to let her know she meant nothing to him, she had no importance in his life.

then he had gone running back to his wall of don't care. no he was not at all concerned about her, it was the work not getting done that bothered him.

today again a phonecall has been made. it is he who is where no one knows. only one call, and everyone must be reached through it...

did he even know or think he would reach the one he really needed to now.

then or now, it was always her.

the faraq only perhaps is he now knows exactly why... kyun faraq padta hai. and going even further he knows... that is all that matters.

that she matters.

to him.

the episode moved not too elegantly but surely toward the call. there was anxiety building in khushi about the whereabouts of asr. she tried to pretend he called when di's worry started to peak, so unlike chhotey, not to call, even though she has left a message. nani caught khushi's lie.

khushi and nani's confabulations by the pool were overheard by masala mama, who ran to his cousin manorama, who slowly extracted the truth and spoke loudly so, most conveniently, di could overhear... and in this chinese whispers the main message managed not to get lost.

chhotey hasn't reached london, di cried... and the glass of milk fell to the ground.

an inauspicious sign no doubt.

all along shyam was seen noting the events, twitching, fretting.

foolish me thought then, he was not the big bad guy, just a sicko henchman. alas.

when matters were taken all the way to let's call the cops, shyam sidled out of the room pretty fast and seconds later the phone rang.

anjali picked up the phone as nani wondered who could be calling so late at night.

she said, "hello!" then her expression changed, she exclamed, "chhotey!"

swiftly, and just like with her brother, relief turned to anger, "chhotey, tum kahan pe ho, tumhe pata hai hum log tumhari kitni chinta kar rahe hain. tumne pahunchne ke baad ek phone bhi nahin kiya... ek message bhi nahi kiya, chhotey!" you didn't even call once after reaching, not even a message you sent, chhotey!

and we have the first new shot of him in almost nine days, after 251.

his head is bent, then he raises it and his face is sombre. almost expressionless. hair flops on forehead, the only sign that he is not in complete control, yet a certain poise.

"di, i'm sorry, main..."

and di butts in with an angry "sorry!"

khushi swallows.

"tum jaantey ho hum yahan pe kitna pareshan ho rahe hain..." do you know how pareshan we all are here...

pareshan... an echo of that conversation from episode 141.

"haan di main london nahin gaya, kyunki mujhe last moment par scotland aana pada..." yes, di, i didn't go to londsn had to come to scotland last minute.

now why did this feel so terribly asr.. find a solution, no matter what, don't hurt di, the fam... don't make them worry. i will get things done.. i am here...

even if a man is pointing a gun at him as we soon realise... mind is thinking.

when di says "tum theek toh ho na..." as someone who loves you would i guess, he replies with that cool that is asr...

"yeah, di i'm fine."

nani grabs the phone.

"chhotey, kaisan hain aap?" chhotey, how are you. her tears and smiles mingle as she tells him she will forgive him this one last time.

and that flicker of the eye, the slight hesitation... what will i tell her to make sure she is reassured, unconsciously a little vulnerability maybe in the eyes... he is so like her in many ways.

silence... then, "ji, nani" to her command to call no matter how busy with a look at khushi... brilliant acting by jayshree t i thought. also by daljeet, her body language when she realises it's chhotey, she sort of sits up, thrusting forward, life in her suddenly.

hello hi bye bye gestures that the phone be given to her, and she rushes in, "arnab bitwa, bhat you dooj?!!"

on the face of asr, a little frown maybe... it's his whacky mami.

"haan mami, bas woh," was there a slight smile?

mami's question about "isskatland se ka laane wale ho?" what are you getting me from scotland, gets the smiles going...

perhaps something feels normal... at last. it has been two days in captivity, no idea what's coming. he tied in ropes to a chair as we shall soon see. a man of extreme energy, strength, always active, suddenly stationery... bound. why am i thinking of samson tied. often a sense of a mythic hero comes by and seems to recognise something of itself in asr... and leaves a trace of it behind as it leaves.

yes, this time definitely a smile as mami prattles.

"khushi, abhi toh thoda muskura de, ab toh arnav ji ka phone bhi aa gaya," payal urges a her forlorn younger sister to smikle, now that arnav ji has called. she obviously can't bear to see khushi the ever sprightly girl in this state.

"iskatland se isskiretwa leke aao... kaisan ho tum?" mami's talk continues.

he is silent. onto aakash who takes the phone from his mother with a "zara mujhe ..."

asr's face is impassive as he lies to akash in a confident voice... aman doesn't know of this deal.

then a slight hesitation, "l-listen main, shayad touch mein nahin rah paaoonga.." i may not be able to stay in touch. asr is making sure his fam does not worry.

the reception here no good... don't tell di... "phaltoo mein tension lengi..." will be tense for no reason.

"di ka aur..."  a "k" is stuck back of his throat wanting to rush out... "khushi ka khyal rakhna."

take care of di and khushi. a thickening of voice... he may never see them again and be able to do just that. his duty, his desire only to take care of these two people... he knows at this moment, this may never happen again.

 

the piano trills, my heart again flips... why so much sincerity, mister... why should you give such a convincing take... you are just a tv actor, plus you are doing double shifts as you shoot for that movie of yours. you are tired... just give a take and go... not that your telly serial will be judged at cannes or anything. but no, you got to do it just right... right?

then akash surprised him, without asking, "achha bhai aap khushi ji se baat kijiye..." okay, speak to khushi ji...  eyes widened and gleamed ever so slightly.

rabba vey rose.

seemed as though this bit all creatives had woken up for.

khushi looked struck by a terrible emotion... she took the phone and walked away from the rest.

this phone somehow precious beyond all now, her path to arnav ji.

he waited as if to hear her but she said nothing, at last he got ready to speak.

he closed his eyes, pursed his lips, a streak of emotion unsettling.

at last he called out, lips  trembling a bit, unsure? what was it...

"khushi" intimate, special every time, an appeal, a connection.

and the gust of wind rose.

her eyes said she had heard that call. after so long, her name on his lips. she had probably despaired wondering would she ever hear it. how he had called her in her dream... but now he was here, just across that line.

camera closed up on asr's face... a vulnerability now certainly.

hearing his voice a dam broke and tears came... she had been saying again and again all will be well while filling up with the worst fears...

now he spoke to her...

he listens carefully, the breeze does its thing... it seems to wrap around them and create a separate space, somewhere outside this given physical reality for them... "yahan na sahi, shayad kahin aur ek duniya hogi, jahan tum... aur main kabhi alag nahin hongey" ranjha's words had painted a picture of a world elsewhere where he and her would never be separated... the wind seemed to create just that.

he struggles to say something, she grabs the phone with her other hand too... him, that's who she wants to hold, the phone is just a proxy... she is trying to keep him with her.

"kh.. khushi i'm fine, main theek hoon.. okay..." a breezy voice, level, yet urgent and strangely palpable, as though it is murmuring against her skin...

he's rushing a bit, he wants so much to make her feel alright... he knows she is collapsing... he just knows... what a simply gorgeous understanding of an emotion. i wonder who wrote this bit.

sensitive writing all of a sudden after a while, felt so good,.

"please mat ro..." please don't cry. he sounds so sincere, almost close to tears himself, my legs feel weak and this is i don't know how manyeth time. i feel like a fake marketeer "talking up" a product, but really this is so product worth putting every bit of your money on.

she sobs silently.

rabba vey.

he waits, then,

"khushi bas... bas stop..." a little asr command.

she cries away.

a  slightly impatient asr head turn, "khushi, rona... band karo." stop crying.

why do his lips look so tender, why do they tremble a bit... asr? what's up.

and the melody sweetens, softens, sings a bit, his heart wants to say something... "khushi, main..."

his mouth opens but the words are not there yet...

"khushi, main... woh..."

he must say this... he must.

she weeps, she senses he struggles... but she really has no idea why...

he waits, she grabs the phone in two hands again... hmm hm hmm hums rabba very

and he says it...

"khushi, i love you..."

the volume is  a bit higher, the echo clearer.

but no one put anything in the eyes... that was all him.

her eyes widen.

on his face the most open vulnerable look... not since the day he was missing his mother and buried his face against his sister, this lack of mask. an open expression. simple, true, no game, nothing... a man in love on a phonecall to his beloved holding her close in his heart, telling her he loves her, bas.

at last the undercurrents always flowing below their conversations were heard and said clearly what it was he had really said with every shut up, get out, tum jaisi ladki, seatbelt, tum theek ho, don't you ever... ever do this to me... samjhi tum, koi matlab nahin... and most of all with mujhe faraq nahin padta. 

khushi main...

khushi main woh...

khushi, i love you

......................

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