he paces in his room, bothered. and he remembers siren, ambulance, "stop!" "khushi!! khushi!!!"
it usually happens in the oddest of places, at least that's what i've found. the major realisations of our lives, the big ones, that define us, how unexpected is the way they come, and the place and moment when things hit you.
the writers' and director's instincts here are unerring. and as usual the actor raises it to the level of breathtaking.
happened to him as he bent to pick up a file... an ordinary, everyday moment, yet suddenly it took him on an extraordinary ride and landed him on another planet. the planet of khushi, with an exhale rustling up the "kh" every time, a sense of happiness in the very way the name of the lover is said.
something about asr reminds me of, and don't ask me why, the little prince. the boy full of wonder who was in love with a capricious rose and who had an innocence and wonder in his heart that would confuse and unsettle adults. one of the most tender books i've read. forgotten a lot, but goodreads gave me this long quote... want to put it here. i am trying to feel the wonder in his mind, as he goes through the moments of realisation.
and once he does, his feelings for her are so like the little prince's for his rose. when i think how that must have been wrenched and roiled on that terrace.
anyway... the quote:
the little prince went away, to look again at the roses.
"you're not at all like my rose," he said.
"as yet you are nothing. No one has tamed you, and you have tamed no one.
you're like my fox when i first knew him.
he was only a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes.
but i have made a friend, and now he's unique in all the world."
and the roses were very much embarrassed.
"You're beautiful, but you're empty," he went on. "one could not die for you.
to be sure, an ordinary passerby would think that my rose looked just like you - the rose that belongs to me. but in herself alone she's more important
than all the hundreds of you other roses:
because it is she that i have watered;
because it is she that i have put under the glass globe;
because it is for her that i've killed the caterpillars
(except the two or three we saved to become butterflies);
because it is she that i have listened to, when she grumbled,
or boasted, or even sometimes when she said nothing.
because she is MY rose."
~~~ antoine de st. exupery ~~~
flashbacks in his mind... khushi is shouting at him, "agar aisa hua bhi hota, humara hi accident hota, aapko kya faraq padta..
he hollers back, "of course faraq padta hai dammit."
a swallow at the images, it's all beginning to come together, he steps back and lets go... sitting back on his lounger. his eyes close and his sister's words come to him. i liked the fact that the only person who matters to him emotionally in this world, introduces the idea. in the fit of romance, fam is often forgotten, but ipk remembered fam gives colour and depth to romance. a selfish little only you me world gets suffocating and mean. love doesn't thrive there. theirs is a private world but it never shuts the doors and windows to a larger world with circles and networks of emotions and ties.
"dekhna jis din tumhare zindagi mein woh ladki aaygi na... jisske bina tumhari dhakane ruk jaaygi... jisske bina tum jee nahin paoge... tumhe aisa lagega agar woh tumhe na mili na.. toh tumhari saansey hi ruk jaygi..."
his sister says things he has always found easy to shrug off with eyes rolling and laughter, well she does sound a bit batty, but she speaks the truth... if you believe in the kind of love i do believe in, that is...
you'll see some day that girl will come without whom your heartbeat will stop... without whom you won't be able to live... you'll feel as though if you can't have her, your breathing will cease.
okay, stomach holding laughter stuff, but as i said, sach not jhoot. baat sirf vishwas ki nahin hai, baat sach hai. sorry khushi ji, stole your lines.
director goes for a lovely sound bridge and the girl his sis had said would arrive one day is walking around in her yard, in a dreamy happy mood among swaying sarees hung out on the clotheslines she walks outside, hair flying, pensive, a wind on the rise.
he walks up to his window... the windows of his room, place of reverie... he reflects on things here, sometimes staring at the water outside. here it had to really hit him. lovely direction. especially the exact moment, we see him in his reflection, against black, his lip dragging down in the image as it always does... a certain power to his face with that flaw, that asymmetry.
our face in the mirror, a sort of confrontation with our inner selves. in that instant he touches her with his feelings and connects with his own self too... or so i felt. he stopped running, he leveled. once and for all.
he heard the dil ki dhadkane his sister spoke of at last... dhak dhak dhak dhak... he saw his own reflection, a funny sort of concern, what's this... and then the realisation...
just one word... "khushi!"
it seemed to merge with a gust of wind.
spectacular moment wrought by an actor.
the wind rose and carried the message to her... anyone seen pocahontas? the wrap of breeze and leaves?
she clutched her heart. it hit her straight there. she's disturbed, it's such a loud thudding now... hints of telepathy already here. actually they've often felt same things at the same time. happens in many love stories... who would have thought they'd take all that and convert it to a magical telepathic conversation one day and two actors would just go all out to make us believe this actually happened. lovely.
there's no denying any more, he swallows.
she thinks of him holding her bangles, caressing them, owning them, owning him... he's yelling at her, who do you think you are... i thought... i thought i lost you... what if i lost you...
she's bewildered, though within her a woman already has all the answers, but her conscious i guess has to grow and evolve to what the subconscious has grasped and processed. again that moment of realisation coming when it is time for it to come.
"woh itna gussa kyun the... aur humari itni fiqr..."
why was he so angry? and so much concern for me?
she thinks of him shouting at her out of tremendous concern, why did you try those bangles, what if you got hurt, what if you slit a vein...
"aur yeh chooriyan?" and these bangles?
he had admitted he had indeed bought these for her. oh the tenderness of these moments.
music enters, happy, dancing, and rises, her heart is full of a feeling so beautiful, she plays with her bangles and expresses it all...
"kuch waqt pehele agar kissine humse kaha hota ki arnav singh raizada ek din humare liye chooriyan kharidenge toh hum bilkul vishwas nahin karte.. shyayad has has ke pagal ho jaate..."
if a while back anyone had told me that asr would one day buy me bangles, i'd have never believed... i'd have gone mad laughing.
instead she's laughing and deliriously happy at this moment.
two beautiful scenes interlocked telling the story of a heady passionate love.
that scene of asr's realisation and a morning walk... this episode were about these two things to me. the serious internalising of a truth that will change a man's life. and then a walk with a smile from the heavens above on a lover's face... there is perfection on this earth. everything need not be a compromise.
natty man in brown suit, white shirt. nk rushes about with camera... shadi ka joda and gehne have to reach the gupta house... nk almost stole this chance too... di panicked...
then he stepped in smartly and took the tray, aww that little rush suddenly, letting his guard drop, showing his determination...
nk of course asks, "why are you all crushing me?" when he meant to say, "why are you all staring at me?"
choor... crushing... yes some dreams will be crushed soon. that "choor" in the middle of such a happy morning, a slightly evil writer's hint maybe? haww.
"main bhi ussi taraf ja raha hoon..." he's going her way...
fun music, i can watch him almost lunge forward and pip nk to the post a million times... the man of action... he knows now why he feels things for that crazy girl. he will act on it.
"nk, tum sari decorations samhal lena..." nk, you take care of the decorations... while i go get the babe, is left unsaid but clearly meant. poor nk.
"haah, (sigh) copycat, nannav," karan goddwani has got nk so so right. cool dude "phoren" with a slightly effeminate air, an incredible innocent clean sweetness, i see karan in scenes from other shows, he is again a good actor with an ability to enter character.
"mera excuse chura liya..." stole my excuse moans nk. shyam watches, urgency growing. nani and di are thrilled. di says she will go to mandir... shyam must act.
the direction and storytelling in these episodes are tight and concentrated, not a shot wasted. and a clever and satisfying juxtaposition of rising romance and growing more tense evil.
"ai dekho nand kissore ai gaye..." so asr was directly referred to as nand kissore. interesting. he is the ocean, he is the lord. and barun is the lord of the oceans, arnav... maha interesting.
he sits there looking around for her... she seems to be not there, the poor fellow gets ready to leave... main chalta hoon.
and then on a deadly look back, his trademark palat, he hears... "khushi bitiya bahar hi hai..." khushi is outside managing all the work.
and we come outside. what a sight... lots of onion tomato chilli... very khoosie bitiya ingredients.
she's talking to cooks, getting things done, most natural acting by sanaya... lovely shots really. unpretentious, sunny, happy.
he walks out onto the verandah and comes looking, eyes hungry.
as he reaches the corner, he sees her. just look at that expression.
and of course music comes tumbling in just like jill. it rejoices with its pure happy notes... ting ting ting ting hey hey.
he stands there as she with her back to him keeps working... he stands there gazing, happy, joyous actually, eyes lit with love, a slight smile, he could stand here forever.
he starts walking down the verandah. rabba vey comes together and plays.
she still has no idea, just working, smiling to herself... delightful.
he pauses... looking and loving.
you got to love this man loving that woman.
and suddenly as she walks toward the verandah, he is in her peripheral vision range, something registers and dhak dhak dhak dhak. she clutches her heart.
she closes her eyes. when she opens them... the gust of wind is here... and she looks and sees him.
hey hey.
again so minutely detailed and crafted this scene, the feeling of pride in work and great instinct for storytelling are evident.
both stand staring at each other... then the world's most beautiful walk, on a verandah in jamna paar lakshmi nagar, and a courtyard outside.
eyes locked, smiles bemused, hearts beating at same pace, they walk in unison on a parallel track which will beat all mathematical theorems and assertions and meet at a point...
he smiles at her... she smiles back. a simple exchange. a completely new and shimmery note in their interaction.
both so gentle and tender and just sussing things.
of course then comes the moo and the chaos of pattal plate... just an ipk thing. take the viewer to intensity, through anger tempest temper tenderness whatever, then lighten the load.
keep it weird...all a bit ajeeb, that watchword and supremely magnificently hatke.
"hey bhagwan yeh humne kya kar diya... sab aapki galati hai..." oh g what have i done, all your fault, she rages at him, but all pouty and nakhra queen.
"excuse me, gai ko pattal tumne khilaya isme meri kya galati hai..." you fed the plates to the cow and how is it my fault, he took his asr stance, but in the most uff flirtatious way.
"par dhyan toh..." but my attention was.. oh oh kkg, the truth is out and the man with stick out ears can hear it all.
he would have pushed for more with that walk down the steps and again, tell me how is it my fault, but a look at her face and he gets her concern.
so the man takes charge.
"okay just relax..." first time he said "relax" i think... i could just close my eyes and feel happy for a long while with just that.
"khushi, main pattal le aya..." off he goes and gets some pattal plates... a truckload, just enough for twenty people. but tomorrow he'll do something even more astounding. ah, when a man loves a woman. or a little prince loves his rose.
and why must some people smile like that at a girl who gives them acidity.
............
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