Wednesday, 16 December 2015

ipkknd ek jashn 8... that red mark




a faint red mark got left behind... lipstick on her lover's cheek, not going anywhere, not in a rush.

i had fretted about khushi's behaviour till 7, but now i seem to see she does it all to get his undivided attention. she at last i think has allowed herself to feel things she hadn't for the longest time, thanks to sp achhi bahu attack among other things. the whole crux of the matter is this man she is crazy about keeps forgetting their anniversary, and she loves all the over the top sweet things of wedding annis.. and why not. remember her plan as to what she'd do after she got married... just sit around all dressed up and watch tv.

the girl loves fun times and now that for just a little while sp has relented seeing the aspirations and desires of non sp bahus who are target audience, what a relief to see a lovely woman (still child woman yet all woman) besotted with her man... and oh what a man. i had written pages and pages about khushi's sexuality and the stymieing of it.

how lovely to see her hold asr with a happy cheery smile, owning him... yes, mine, mine... says that look, she smiles and hugs him knowing she has him where she wants him.

and then that easy unrestrained kiss. a long distance has been traveled since the rushed kiss on the poolside, the slow shy ones later... her body language is easy, her need for him clear. in it is infused that element that makes her her... khushi... happiness. yet the desire in it is the one that rose chaotically on another night of red... diwali. that day, she had wanted him and not stopped to think about good bad right wrong. just a pulsating trenchant complete desire, a curiosity that made her dizzy, made her long, made her rave when he turned away. the fire burns deep within. and says its story through tell tale signs.

red on him... so long ago she had left that... a cut they'd both shared from the same splinter of bangle, their blood had touched... he'd tried hard to erase the mark of sindoor on his hand, the red of a rabba vey meeting in his mind, the red of diwali's desire. he hadn't succeeded. and he had forced a red on her... sindoor smeared on the parting in her hair, an angry annihilating sindoor... yet it had remained shimmering and alive, leading them out of darkness.

red was always there and theirs... her lipstick, his rose, little signatures.

as thoughts flow effortlessly through my mind, long back past and not that far away past and the present overlap and come together, a thought.

did laad governor do all of this on purpose?

the man is not silly as we all know. nor is he the sweetly smiling sort... unless he is in that totally smitten with sanka devi, love of his life frame of mind. has anyone seen usual suspects, did laad governor just lead us all on? i didn't like usual suspects, but it gives me the perfect story of asr and kkgsr and their third anniversary.

what if, asr sets the whole thing up every yer, so his pagal wife goes into her natak mode and gets into sanka moves. way beyond obvious sex and soaked in sugar syrup emotions that we associate love with... is the essence of ajeeb in this love.

he always recalls her weirdness, he adores it i think. and shatir man has this neat plan to get his dose of it every anniversary. he knows she loves doing all this... and he knows nothing makes him happier than making her happy... making up to her, watch her loony brimming smile.

so every year he does this whole pretending to forget thing.

she reacts to it in ways only she can... she "acted" out everything one year. next year, she didn't even bother to do that.

but i am thinking the making up sessions must have more than made up for it. especially, if this what i am seeing is anything to go by.

i also note, asr is not acting lame and supper sucrose anymore... yeah he smiles, but oh he is all male and he flirts and he adores and she is going slightly loopy just looking at him...

that walking forward almost onto her, knowing full well what it does to her. yet he is tender and cherishing... only the way he can be. and only she knows how precious that is.

asr talking to us nonstop... only possible if he is dead serious about no one finding out what he is really up to... not definitely us. teehee.

okay, i am just talking nonsense, but watching asr and khushi... a little changed, in the way one can be, and somehow looking married yet lover like, something completely deadly about them in their red and blue (hmm not brown). that without any pause hug of his the moment she opened the door... her joyous holding. his capitulation, but a winner's stance right through... my mind is perhaps in disarray. of the most happy kind.

long long ago, a red stain was left on me, never went away, never washed away... suddenly it felt touched and alive.

the script remained banal, the sets looked strange, again i felt the truth of... i don't need anything else.




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